


I Want to Break Free

by nerdyscully (dalecooperscoffee)



Category: Arrested Development
Genre: ...that may later become resolved, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Family Angst, M/M, Unresolved Sexual Tension, figure skating AU, the timeline is very different from canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-12
Updated: 2019-05-13
Packaged: 2019-08-22 21:58:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 34,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16606193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dalecooperscoffee/pseuds/nerdyscully
Summary: Gob Bluth is a figure skater. After gaining some attention at competitions last year, he now has his sights set on winning the World Championships. He's also very lonely.Tony Wonder is a well-established skater in what he believes will be his last year competing. And he doesn't really know it, but he's lonely too. Despite being competitors, him and Gob strike up a friendship that becomes about more than just skating.





	1. June, 2000

**Author's Note:**

> hello! i know i've been posting a lot lately, but i hope you don't mind seeing me in the archive again!
> 
> this work is really a passion project for me. i have loved and followed figure skating since i was 6 years old. the theatrics and glam of it all, i thought, would suit gob and tony very well. but there's also vulnerability and emotion in skating that i think is beautiful, and provided some great angst for this work :) 
> 
> this also diverts a lot from the original timeline of AD. gob is younger than he would be in the year 2000 in this AU compared to canon. i did this because of what figure skating was like at the time; i thought it would suit gob and tony. i hope you enjoy the first chapter.

The first time Gob saw Tony Wonder up close and in person, they ran into each other at an ice rink in Los Angeles. Tony wasn’t looking in front of him, and he bumped into Gob accidentally, causing him to drop his skates. “Oh, sorry,” Tony said, startled.

Gob was a little speechless. He knew that Tony trained at the same rink as him, but had never had a run-in like this before. At 25, Gob wasn’t as young as some of the skaters that were having their first senior season this year. But Tony had been in the game since he was 17. In 1997 he had taken bronze at Worlds. Hell, the guy had gone to the _Olympics_. Gob had not adequately prepared for meeting him. “I-It’s okay,” he stammered.

“Are you here to skate? Who’s your coach?”

“Um, Aleks,” Gob replied.

Tony thought for a moment, then nodded. “Ah, yeah, I know him. Good guy. You’re Gob, right? You competing this year? I think I heard that you did well at the Challenger events last year.”

“Yeah. I mean…Grand Prix is the plan, for this year,” he shrugged, trying to seem nonchalant over the fact that _Tony goddamn Wonder knew his name_. “You?” Tony had taken a break last year. Many figure skating fans had mentioned they had missed his skating; Gob had been one of these.

“Yeah. I figured I had at least one more year in me. I look forward to seeing you skate! You seem like you’d be pretty strong out there.”

Gob felt a rush in his stomach—the good kind, the kind he got when his brother actually said something nice about him for once. The kind when someone smiled at him genuinely, not in an “aww, you poor, stupid thing” way. “Oh, um, thanks! I mean, you’re great, but you know you’re great, right?” he rambled like a starstruck idiot.

“I mean, I’m not like World Champion or anything. But then again, I’m also not Russian.” Tony joked. Gob snorted. “Sorry. That was mean.” Tony said after a second thought, but there was still a smirk on his face. “Anyway, I shouldn’t keep you from your practice. I’ll see you, right?”

“Right!” Gob said with no hesitation. He smiled at Tony one last time and then rushed off to meet his coach.

Aleks was not Gob’s first coach; he had different ones as a little boy and as a teenager, but when he got serious about competing, he got a serious coach. That wasn’t to say Aleks wasn’t nice. He was an incredibly patient and warm man, but also cold when he wanted to be. Gob could always tell when he was disappointed in an element of Gob’s skating. Other coaches were instructing men as young as 16 and 17 who were already in the senior division. But Gob wasn’t well-established like Tony was, and so he always felt like he stuck out like a sore thumb even at 25. He was already there at the rink, absentmindedly skating around while Gob laced his skates up.

 “Hi,” he said as he skated up to him.

 “Hello,” Aleks replied; he was Russian, but he had been living in the US long enough that his accent had become faint and only came out when he was really angry. He still had a tendency to drop his articles like “a” and “the” occasionally, which made him sound more Russian than anything else. “How are you feeling today?” he always asked this.

“I’m fine,” Gob said. He always replied this way even when he wasn’t.

“I want to work on this _Queen_ program you have big dreams about.”

Gob chuckled. “Okay. I mean, it’s just a thought I had, maybe it’s crazy.”

“Not so crazy. You see what kind of music they skate to these days?” Aleks said. He had a good point. “Queen is very dramatic. Like _Final Countdown._ You are good with drama.”

“I have my family to thank for that, I guess.” Gob laughed mirthlessly. Aleks either didn’t get it or didn’t think it was funny. He had a point though. Gob’s long program to an instrumental arrangement of “The Final Countdown” had impressed crowds last season. He got silver because of that program in Italy. When he was “on”, he could be captivating. Now, though, he had his sights set on a long program to a medley of the songs of Queen. He had grown up loving and listening to Freddie Mercury constantly. The least he could do was pay tribute to him in his skating.

 “Gob? Pay attention to me. You think about other things too much. I lose you.”

“Sorry,” he mumbled.

“I know you will want lots of jumps in Queen program. So we need to work on lutz. You had hard time with lutz last season,” Aleks reminded him of all the falls he made last season and he winced. “No more wasting time. Let’s work!”

Gob tried to keep his mind focused on skating in the moment, but he kept thinking about how Tony Wonder said he “seemed like he’d be a strong skater”. Aleks was right, he _had_ to improve his lutz if he wanted to impress Tony. He probably should’ve been more worried about the competition, but that would come later in the season.

 It took a few times, but by the end of the session Gob was landing his lutzes and loops pretty cleanly. Aleks looked pleased, which was the best thing to see at the end of the hour. “Very good! You need to remember to think about now. Not future. It will be your downfall.”

 “Sorry, sometimes I…zone out.”

“Maybe you drink too much coffee. We are done for the day. Be healthy.”

 It was strange, in a way, because Gob’s coaches had said things to him that his parents had never said, even though they should’ve. One time he came to practice with a fever and Aleks had scolded him for nearly 10 minutes. “Are you dumb?! I know you are not dumb Gob!” he had yelled, the heavy accent reappearing. Funnily enough, that was probably the only time Gob had been reassured he was not dumb. It may have been the fever, but he kind of found it touching how much Aleks cared.

 Gob took his skates off and replaced them with his street shoes, waving goodbye to Aleks as he walked out of the rink, patting down his jean’s pockets for a cigarette. When he found one, he stuck it in his mouth and lit it the moment he got outside. Smoking was starting to fall out of fashion very quickly, and he knew Aleks hated when he could smell cigarettes on him. But hell, it was sometimes the only way he could relax after practice. When he got to his car, he sat there for a while, smoking and letting himself not think about anything, almost as if he was preparing himself for the 45 minute drive to Newport from LA (though with traffic, it was often longer than that). He butted his cigarette and started up his car, not sure why he found himself lonely.

 He had gotten one of those cell phones lately, a clunky thing that he often forgot to take with him. As he pulled out of the rink’s parking lot, he dialed Michael’s number. “Hello?” his brother answered.

“Hey. I just got done with practice. What are you upto?”

 “Oh, are you back with the skating thing?”

 “Well, duh, _someone_ has to win Worlds.”

 Michael hummed in the way that showed he wasn’t really interested at all. Gob heard a soft voice ask, “Who’s that, honey?”—it was Tracey, Michael’s new wife. Gob liked her a lot. She was sweet and always laughed at his jokes even though he could kind of tell she didn’t like all of them. The wedding had been fine even though he had set things on fire. But with Michael a newlywed and Lindsay moving to Boston, Gob had no one to really talk with. There was Buster, but what was there to talk about with him? Mother? That subject got old after about five minutes.

“It’s my brother,” Michael said, then returned to Gob. “What do you want, Gob?”

“I was just…wondering what you were doing this evening.” Gob shifted onto the highway, where he could already see some traffic forming.

 “I’m not doing—listen, Gob, why don’t you go out? Make some friends? You can’t call me every night and ask to hang out. I have a wife now.”

 “I know, but we could all go out together! It wouldn’t be so bad, would it?”

 Michael sighed. “Another day, okay? I have work in the morning. I’ll talk to you later, Gob.”

“Wait, I—” Gob began, but he was cut off when Michael hung up. He sighed deeply. He kept driving and when he reached the usual exit he took, he passed it and took the next one, for the street he knew had a bar on it. At least people wanted to talk to him there.

* * *

 

He went back to the rink two days later, and when he walked in there was Tony Wonder, practicing. Gob stopped in his tracks, watching Tony glide across the ice and transition from spiral to spin seamlessly. When he did a (perfectly landed) triple salchow, Gob’s breath caught in his throat. But when Tony tried an axel, he fell and spun out on his ass. Gob nearly yelled, he was so surprised. He guessed it made sense—even Tony Wonder wasn’t unflappable.

Tony looked a little frustrated, but he kept working hard for the few minutes left of his practice. He talked to his coach, then skated off the ice. He caught Gob’s eye and smiled. “Oh, hey Gob! Nice to see you again.”

“You too. You were great out there.”

Tony shrugged. “I fucked up my axel, but thanks. Did you see that?”

“I-uh-um…”

He laughed. “You can say yes, you know.”

“Yeah, I saw. But it’s okay! I can barely land a lutz clean!” Gob sat down and started working on tying up his skates. “Hey, what are you…doing after this?” he asked, avoiding eye contact with Tony. He had asked the question on a sudden whim and he felt embarrassed. He knew he probably looked like a total fanboy.

“I’m not doing anything, but do you wanna get a drink or anything? It is a Friday.” Tony offered.

“Yeah! Yeah, I-I’m sorry for asking so out of the blue, I…all my friends are, you know, busy, and…” Gob’s face was turning red. _Jesus Christ_ , he thought. _Try to at least be kind of cool._

“I gotcha. I haven’t gone out for a drink in forever. Mind if I stay and watch while you practice? I can like, read or something if you get nervous,” Tony looked a little smug, but somehow that made Gob think he was even cooler.

“Oh, I…I’m not the type to get nervous. You can totally watch, I don’t care.” Gob lied. Aleks was entering the rink from the other side, and he smiled and waved at Gob. Gob removed his blockers and skated onto the ice, looking as confident as possible, which was hard because he hadn’t been this nervous in a long time. “Hi,” he said to Aleks, hoping his voice wasn’t shaking.

“Hi. You were talking to Tony Wonder?”

“Yeah, we’re, uh, grabbing a drink after this, actually.” Gob said.

“That’s good. Don’t drink too much, though.”

Gob scoffed. “You’re from like, the land of vodka.”

“Oh, that is stereotype. You must stay in shape, I am not one to worry about.”

Gob sighed, but secretly he was happy that someone was worried about his health. “So. I think we should work with the choreographer next week. For the Queen program?”

“Yes, good idea. But what about your short program?” Aleks asked.

Gob hadn’t really thought about that. He had been so dedicated to the idea of the Queen-themed long program that his short program had been pushed aside. Last year, he had skated to “Flight of the Bumblebee” by Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov for his short program. It had been a high energy, manic program that had impressed judges just from the sheer speed of it all. “I don’t know what I’m doing for my short this year.”

“I have idea. What about something slower? You are always so fast. Like a blur moving across the ice. You have passion, why not do a passionate program?”

Gob shrugged. He didn’t know how to be slow. He didn’t even really consider himself to be a passionate person, just someone who felt too much all at once. Was that what passion was? When he thought of passion, he thought of, like, Romeo and Juliet. And that wasn’t his scene.  “I guess I could look for some music today.”

“Yes please. I don’t want you to be a…how do you say that? One-trick-pony?”

Gob laughed. “If I was any animal, I don’t think I’d be a horse.”

Aleks shook his head. “That is not important. Let’s skate.”

Gob worked on some elements that he wanted to include in his Queen program, acutely aware that Tony’s eyes were on him the whole time. He wondered if Tony had seen any of his programs from last year. There were some performances he was incredibly proud of from last year, and some not so much. The night where he fucked up almost every jump, causing his mother to call and scoff and laugh at him, still haunted him. He was determined to not have a performance like that this season. By the halfway mark of his lesson he had lost himself in determination and was gritting his teeth with every jump. “Focused today,” Aleks commented. “I should have Tony watch every lesson.”

Gob tossed that idea around in his head for a moment. On one hand, it terrified him, on the other, he wanted to show Tony what he was capable of. He guessed he would see what Tony said after this session. Soon enough, his time was over, and Aleks told him to have a good weekend and stay healthy as always. Tony smiled at Gob as he skated off the ice and sat down. “You’re pretty good. Thanks for letting me watch.”

“It’s nothing,” Gob shrugged, taking off his skates. “I hope it wasn’t boring or anything.”

“No, not at all. You have a lot of energy and you’re really dedicated. I like that,” Tony smiled, and Gob felt his body sag a little in relief—so Tony didn’t see him as a total amateur. “But I really need a drink. It’s been a long week. Ready to go?”

Gob nodded and stood up, slinging his bag with his skates over his shoulder. “Um, do you have a car?” he asked.

 “No, there’s no need for one in LA. I thought we’d take the bus?”

“Oh, no, I have a car. I’ll drive.” Gob quickly said.

 “Wow, thanks!” Tony grinned. “I’ll buy you a drink for that.”

 “Sounds good.”

 Gob stopped by a bar that Tony recommended. He learned on the car ride that Tony had moved from New York to LA. When Gob asked why he hadn’t stayed, Tony had shrugged and said “I needed to get away. I feel bad for my mom though. I practically gave her a heart attack when I moved away.”  

Gob had scoffed and said “My mom wishes I would move away from LA.” He was surprised at the concerned look Tony gave him. When they got to the bar, the bouncer waved Tony in but carded Gob, which he took great pride in. He was still young and baby-faced!

The bar was pretty packed, understandably for a Friday night. They managed to get seats at the counter and Gob ordered a White Russian, and Tony ordered a whiskey sour. “Thanks for coming out with me,” Gob said. “I haven’t gone out for a drink in a long time.”

“Neither have I. It was nice to have someone ask me. How do you like working with Aleks?”

 “It’s my second year now, and he’s pretty good. He worries about everything, though.”

 Tony smiled. “That’s what coaches do.”

 “No, even little things! Like ‘oh, did you eat today’, or ‘you look sad, are you okay’…it’s weird.”

“So he’s like a parent,” Tony said, then looked up as the bartender handed them their drinks. “Thanks.”

“Yeah, thanks,” Gob said, immediately sipping his White Russian and sighing. The burn of the vodka going down was just what he needed. “I guess he is. But even my parents don’t say things like that.”

“You should meet my mom. God, she worries so much. Like, I’m nearly 30 now and she still treats me like I’m a little kid. I know I’m her youngest son and all, but…” Tony shook his head and took a long sip of his drink. “What about you, you got any brothers? Or sisters?”

“Two brothers and a sister. I’m the oldest though.”

 “Do they live in LA? Do they ever come to watch you skate?”

 “Well…my sister just moved to Boston, and my brother Michael is busy with his wife all the time. But sometimes my little brother Buster comes to watch, or watches on TV. But my mom and dad…they don’t care. They only care if I fail, so they can have a reason to make fun of me,” Gob chuckled dryly.

 Tony furrowed his brow. “Are you alright?”

“Huh? Yeah, I’m fine. Am I being a bummer? I swear I don’t mean to be. My family is just like that.” Gob shrugged.

“I guess our parents are just really different…” Tony replied, and dropped the subject, but his eyes still had that concerned and confused look. They talked about skating and other somewhat trivial things for a few hours, Tony letting himself get pleasantly buzzed and Gob, typically, staying sober no matter how much he drank. When it drew later into the night, Tony had started yawning.

 “You need me to take you home?” Gob laughed.

“Yeah, sorry, too much whiskey, I think. You drank a lot of vodka, how are you not at least stumbling a little?”

“I, uh, used to drink a lot.” Gob explained as they started walking to the car.

“I mean, with a family like yours, how could you _not_ drink?” Tony asked, feeling loose and overly honest. “They sound awful. I’m sorry. That’s mean. Is that mean?” Gob helped him into the passenger side of the car, then, walked around to the driver’s side. “Are you sure you’re okay to drive? You drank more than I did, I think,” Tony said.

“I’m very sober right now, I promise. And yeah, my family is fucked up. I guess that’s just a fact,” Gob smiled, but it felt tight and wrong.

 “Hmmm…do you think that affects your skating?”

 “What do you mean?” Gob drove out of the bar’s parking lot. “Just let me know where to go to your house, by the way.”

“Yeah, just keep going straight. And…what I mean is, like…I dunno, from what I saw today, and from last year, you’re really good, but you can be kind of stiff. You don’t let it, like, flow. You don’t let yourself feel.” Tony said, sounding particularly tipsy. “You’re very flashy! And that’s good! But it’s like what I heard you talking about with Aleks. Passion and all.”

Gob tried not to frown. “I’m not really good with passion, I guess.”

“I think if you tried to do a really emotional program, you could really make waves this season.”

“You’re technically my competition, should you really be giving me advice?”

“Ehhh,” Tony shrugged and leaned against the window. “It’s probably my last year. What the hell. I guess I just wanna see _more_ of you, not just the flashy theatrical Final Countdown stuff. Oh, turn here.”

“I guess I’ll keep that in mind.” Gob said and turned the corner.

 Tony yawned again. “I don’t mean to sound like a dick. I just think it would be cool to see you do something really out of the blue. Here, it’s this house.”

 “Alright. Um, thanks for the advice.” Gob knew he should feel honored to be getting advice from Tony Wonder himself, but it felt like he had hit the nail on the head, and it made Gob uncomfortable. He knew he had a hard time being open and vulnerable, and that’s why he did the theatrical programs. “Sleep well, okay?”

“Yeah. I’ll see you Monday, right?”

 “I’m sure. Night, Tony.” When he drove away, Gob felt disquieted. He turned on the radio so he wouldn’t be alone with his thoughts. He knew what Tony said was true. So why was it bugging him so damn much?

He kept driving, alone in the dark, trying and failing to ignore his feelings.


	2. End of June, 2000

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i want to say thank you for all the nice comments on the first chapter! they've meant a lot, and this fic means a lot to me, so i hope you all continue to like it <3
> 
> i feel like this chapter is a little heavy on the exposition, but i kind of treated these first two chapters as a prologue before all the competitions start and things get really interesting. so, apologies if this is boring, but the juicy stuff will start soon.
> 
> disclaimer: i have never been professionally trained in figure skating, nor have i gone to any international competitions. so, if my fic is unrealistic, i apologize. i've done a lot of research for this fic, but i'm sure i didn't get everything right. so, please don't take my interpretation of things too seriously! thank you for reading!

Gob was looking through records in his mother’s penthouse. Lucille sat on the couch sipping a martini. “How many men in figure skating are gay, I wonder,” she said dryly to no one in particular.

“I dunno,” Gob said, annoyed. “Why do you care?”

  
“It just all seems so feminine.”

  
“It’s actually a lot of hard work, which you would know if-if you ever came,” Gob could feel repressed anger bubbling over, and pushed it back down, flipping through the records again. Selections from West Side Story jumped out at him, and he turned it over and looked at the songs. He had seen the movie as a kid when it was on TV, and he remembered liking it for all the fun dance numbers. He was pretty sure the ending was sad, so maybe this would be the passionate program that Aleks wanted from him. “Where’s the record player, mom?”

  
“In storage somewhere,” she said, lighting a cigarette. “Or, actually, I think it’s in Buster’s room. I put it in there because he wanted to listen to something, I can’t remember. Go ask him.”

  
Gob took the record and walked to Buster’s room, where his younger brother was sitting on the floor, reading a book. He was recently out of high school and had no idea what he wanted to do, and Gob was sure Lucille wouldn’t let him leave the house any time soon. Gob never saw him much, but whenever he had the misfortune of going to his mother’s penthouse, he usually had a nice chat with Buster.

  
“Oh, hey brother,” Buster said when he saw Gob walk into the room. “I didn’t know you were here.”

  
“Hi. Do you still have the record player? I want to listen to something for skating.”

  
Buster nodded and rummaged through his closet, finding the small record player that had been around since they were kids and CDs didn’t exist yet. He put the record on the tray and listened silently for a few minutes. “So…what’s this for again?” Buster asked.

  
“I need music for my short program. This movie is sad, right? My coach wants a sad program.”  
“Oh. Are you sad?” Buster asked, frowning.

  
Gob chuckled. “No. No, I’m never sad. I just need a program that’ll impress the judges.”  
“Can I come watch when you start? It’s cold and all at the rink, but…it’s better than watching on TV. When mother lets me go, I mean,” his brother said. Gob was thankful that at least one person in his family supported him.

  
“Yeah, of course you can come, Bustie. I’m gonna win this year, you know.”

  
“Oh! Yeah! Maybe mother will stop saying mean things about you then.” Buster grinned, but the compliment was lost on Gob and he sighed, turning back to the record. He skipped around, looking for a passionate song. When he heard an ethereal-sounding female voice, he skipped to the beginning of that song and listened intently.

  
It was a duet, with a man’s low and sexy (not that men were sexy to Gob, of course…) voice starting the song. “ _There’s a place for us_ ,” he declared, “Somewhere a place for us. Peace and quiet and open air wait for us, somewhere.” Gob remembered this part of the movie. He remembered the male and female lead looking at each other like they were the only two people that mattered in the world. That was Passion, he was sure of it. Buster was a little perplexed as to why Gob looked so concentrated and thoughtful, but he shrugged and turned back to his book while Gob listened. The voices of the man and woman swelled with the instruments and the song finished with _“Hold my hand we’re halfway there, hold my hand and I’ll take you there. Somehow! Someday, somewhere!_ ” And Gob knew he had found his song. He would just have to find the perfect instrumental version.

  
“This is perfect,” Gob said, to no one in particular. “Thanks Bustie.” He took the needle off the record and stuffed it back in the case. He needed to call Aleks immediately.

  
“Aww, you’re leaving already?” Buster asked when he stood up. “It’s so boring these days. I never see anyone anymore.”

  
“I know, neither do I,” Gob sighed. Buster was the only sibling he had that wanted to spend time with him. When Gob was a teenager, he thought it was embarrassing and he pushed him away. He still kind of thought it was embarrassing to be seen with his little brother, but at least Buster smiled at him. Michael never did. And Lindsay never did. And his parents definitely never did. “Why don’t you go out and, I dunno, meet people?” Gob said, grimacing a little. Michael had said the same thing to him just a little while ago. Well, he had met someone; a famous figure skater at that. _So take that, Mikey_ , he thought.

  
Buster laughed. “Who would I meet? Mother’s bridge friends? You’re funny, Gob.”

  
Gob rolled his eyes. “I’ll see you around, okay?”

  
“Okay! Good luck with skating!”

* * *

 

When Gob showed Aleks the song he had found, he was pleasantly surprised. “This is very good,” he said. “I think this could be very beautiful program. Let’s work with choreographer this week.”

  
Gob nodded. The Queen program had mostly been choreographed and now it was a matter of running and perfecting it before the Grand Prix circuit began in early fall. He was already worried about choreographing the short program, since it wasn’t fast or manic or all over the place. He would have to be like the other guys; slow and passionate and tender. He felt like he’d look stiff, like Tony had said.

  
There was a maximum of eight jumps in a free skate for men, and Gob had all eight. It was just a matter of landing them and making the transitions from jump to jump flow. “Are you warmed up? Want to run what we have?” Aleks asked. Gob nodded to both questions, and his coach went to set up the music.

  
The medley started with the opening bassline of “Another One Bites the Dust”, and it hit the ground running from there. When he skated, Gob tried to only think of three things: landing his jumps, getting the right timing, and the cold air hitting his face. Something that feeling was so intoxicating, the mixture of heat from the physical activity and the icy cold of the rink. It was unlike anything else, and it was the most refreshing feeling in the world. His first jump was when “Another One Bites the Dust” transitioned into the piano section of “Somebody to Love”. He landed the triple salchow but landed two-footed when it was time for his loop. He knew he looked frustrated, and he knew his expression only worsened when he saw someone watching from the sides out of the corner of his eye. He flung himself around and kept skating, perhaps too aggressively because everything felt hard and none of his landings were quite right. He stopped midway through the program, when the operetta part of “Bohemian Rhapsody” changed to “I Want to Break Free”. He skated up to Aleks, feeling like he looked absolutely pathetic.

  
“This is good so far! Why do you look so mad?”

  
“I just messed up a lot. Like always.”

  
“We will work on elements when we train on Wednesday,” Aleks said. “Today was to practice choreography, and you’re doing well. But you get very aggressive. You throw yourself up so hard, pushing all this weight down on yourself when you land. It’s not healthy.”

“Yeah, I…I dunno, I got frustrated, I guess,” Gob stammered.

  
“You can’t skate frustrated. I hope you don’t do that in competition!”

  
He had before, and his coach knew it. “I won’t this year,” he promised. “Is someone else here for private ice time?” he asked, gesturing toward the girl watching.

  
“Ah, I’m sorry, that is my other student. I forgot to tell you she was coming.” Aleks motioned for her to come onto the ice, and Gob saw that it was Sally Sitwell. He was surprised—he knew Sally skated here too, but she had always had a different coach. “Gob, you know Sally? She will train with us a little today. She is a new student with me.”

  
“Hi Sally,” Gob said, feeling awkward. Him and Sally had been in each other’s orbits for a long time. They had been going to the same rink since they were teenagers, and they went to high school together as well. Gob had always tried to get in her pants, mostly because Michael liked her, and Gob liked annoying Michael. But she was never interested, and now that they were grown up Gob wondered if she still thought he was as sleazy as he was in high school. She was a well-established skater, too, and had started competing around the same time Tony did, when she was pretty young. “I didn’t know you switched coaches.”

  
She shrugged. “Yeah, I heard Aleks was really good, and my last coach wasn’t helping me as much as he could.” That added up—she hadn’t medaled last year at all.

“So, occasionally you will train together,” Aleks explained. “I hope this is okay.”

  
“That’s fine,” Gob had trained with other people before. Hopefully he wouldn’t be too self-conscious in front of Sally. It’s not like she was Tony Wonder or anything. For the rest of the practice, Aleks drifted between him and Sally, working on things individually with each of them. After practice, when Gob was unlacing his skates, Sally came up to him.

  
“So, I haven’t seen you around in awhile,” she said.

  
Gob looked up. “Uh, yeah. Not since, like, the Grand Prix last year, right?”

  
“Yeah. God, I sucked last year. I swear that’s not gonna happen again,” she said, almost vindictively. She suddenly reminded Gob of a younger version of his mother.

  
“Eh, everyone has off seasons, right?”

  
“Says the guy in his second season,” she scoffed. “Anyway, I meant to wish you good luck. With Tony back, I don’t know how we’ll do compared to him, but good luck nonetheless.”

  
“You don’t really have to worry about Tony, just the other ladies on the team,” Gob said.

“Anyway, I need a smoke, what are you doing tonight?” He wasn’t sure why he was asking her that, maybe it was a side-affect of his loneliness, though half the time he would deny that he was lonely.

  
She rolled her eyes. So things hadn’t really changed since high school. “I have dinner plans with my dad. How’re your parents, by the way?”

  
“The same.”

“And Michael? He got married recently, didn’t he?”

  
“Yeah, her name’s Tracey. She’s nice. He dropped out of law school for her.”

  
“I’m actually surprised,” she said, “He always seemed so dedicated to working, even in school.”

  
“Getting married makes you do stupid stuff.”

  
“Is that why you’ve never done it?”

  
Gob laughed. “I don’t have to get married til I’m like, 30. I’m not as lame as my little brother.”

  
“Well, whoever marries you, Gob, is gonna have to be a really patient woman. I’ll see you around,” she said, waving and walking off. He wondered if that last comment was supposed to be insulting, but he couldn’t really say she was wrong.

* * *

 

**October 2000**

  
For the rest of the summer, Gob trained consistently, both alone and with other skaters. The Queen program became more solid with each practice, but he still struggled with “Somewhere”. The jumps were there; even the choreography was solid. But he never felt anything when he skated it. He never felt this “passion” that everyone talked about.

  
He went out with Tony for drinks every now and then, but they never got too personal. Tony got more and more focused on competition as the summer went on, and Gob could tell by the way he acted distant as the first event of the Grand Prix approached. The skaters in the area had a meeting a week before it was time for Skate America in Colorado. Rooming was announced, and Gob saw his name next to Tony’s on the list. They were going to live together for three days in a hotel room. _Holy shit._

  
After the meeting, Gob was having a smoke outside the rink, and Tony walked up to him. “So, they decided to send us both to the competition, huh? And we’re rooming together?”

  
Gob exhaled, coughing a bit and waving the smoke out of his face. “I guess,” he said.

“Hopefully I don’t bother you too much.”

  
“You won’t. I’m excited, actually. Nervous as hell,” his voice dropped at the last part, like he was scared to admit it, “But excited.”

  
“Don’t be nervous. You’re the best, at least of the US men.”

  
“I was out for a year, who knows,” Tony sighed, looking absolutely exhausted all of a sudden.

“I hate to ask this, but can I bum a smoke? I just really need to take a drag right now and relax.”

  
“You just wanna take a drag off mine? Better than wasting a cig. No offense, these things aren’t so cheap anymore,” Gob chuckled.

  
Tony nodded. “Yeah, that worked.” Gob passed him the cigarette and he took a long drag, his whole body sagging with exhale as he handed it back.

  
“I really needed that. I haven’t smoked in a while, but I miss it sometimes, you know?”  
Gob nodded. “I don’t even think about quitting, it’s the only way I relax after practice or competitions. Aleks is gonna kill me for it someday.”

  
Tony smiled. “I gotta go, but I’ll see you soon. I’m excited,” he said again, “You’re gonna do great, Gob.”

  
Gob smiled back as he walked away. As he continued to puff on his cigarette, he realized, for some reason, he had shared an indirect kiss with Tony. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the line gob says at the end of s5a about going on tour and sharing a room is so sweet, i had to give him his wish in this fic.
> 
> thank you again for reading, i will update soon! xoxoxo


	3. October 24, 2000

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry it took me a little while to update this fic, i had a small bout of writer's block. hopefully i will be able to update consistently over winter break!!
> 
> some explanation about scoring stuff you'll see in this chapter: in 2000, skating was scored under the "6.0 system". basically you have 7 judges that score a skater's technical elements and presentation (artistry) on a scale of 1-6. 1 is "very poor" and 6 is "outstanding". back in this day i would say 4s and 5s were somewhat average for a skater like gob would be. i hope this all made sense! enjoy the chapter!

The skaters arrived in Colorado Springs Tuesday evening. Competition was to begin on Thursday, and Wednesday was a day dedicated to practice. Gob, who had always been fidgety on planes and avoided them during the non-skating season, was reminded why he hated flying. He felt sick and disoriented despite the fact Colorado wasn’t that far from California. He felt like he needed a whole pack of cigarettes or a whole bottle of vodka to feel like himself again. When they got set up in their hotel room, Tony turned to Gob and spoke to him for what was practically the first time that day; they didn’t sit together on the plane and had only passing small talk at the airport.

  
“God, you look tired,” he couldn’t help but chuckle a little. “Are you sick?”

  
Gob shook his head. “I don’t think so, I just don’t like flying that much.”

  
“Well, I think a few people on the US team are gonna grab dinner at the restaurant down the street, wanna come?”

  
“Is there alcohol involved?” Gob asked.

  
Tony raised an eyebrow. “Would your coach like that?”  
“My mother was an alcoholic who put vodka in my bottles as a baby. I can’t remember the last time I’ve been drunk, and honestly I don’t think I ever will be,” he said bluntly. Tony had a look on his face that Gob couldn’t decipher, but it looked like it was a mix between fear and amazement.

  
“N-no offense,” Tony began, and Gob realized it was probably the first time he had seen him so taken aback. “But how are you alive?”

  
Gob shrugged. “I dunno. I don’t think about death a lot. Maybe that’s why. Is this outfit okay to go out?” he asked, gesturing to his button up shirt and jeans.

  
“Yeah, that’s fine. I’m ready if you are.”

They met the other US skaters down in the lobby, and they walked across the street to a pub. “God, this is a bad idea,” Sally said to no one in particular. “I’m just gonna have fries.”

  
“Ah, you’ll just skate it all off tomorrow,” Andrew, one of the pairs skaters, said. “Unless your coach is that mean.”

  
“He’s not,” Gob confirmed, and at the strange look from Andrew, clarified, “We have the same coach. He won’t care if you eat, Sally. I mean, you don’t want to feel all hungry and shitty tomorrow.” They were seated, and Gob immediately asked for a beer.

  
“Is your family gonna be watching? Are you nervous about that?” Sally asked Gob.

  
“I don’t know if they are. Sometimes they watch, but mom doesn’t call unless I lose,” Gob said, sighing with relief when he saw the drinks coming.

  
“Ah yeah, I forgot how fucked up your mom is. I mean, uh, sorry,” Sally said.

  
“It’s fine,” Gob replied, but kept it at that. He was already too focused on his beer, and he hadn’t gone out to talk about his mom.

  
Tony turned to him. “You’re skating to West Side Story, right? At least that’s what I heard.”

  
“Yeah, for my short. It’s kind of a slow program, hopefully people don’t fall asleep,” Gob laughed weakly.

  
“I’m excited,” Tony said, and his voice was warm and genuine in a way Gob didn’t usually hear.  
“How about you? You haven’t really told me about your programs.”

  
A wry smile tugged at the corner of his lips. “I usually like to keep them a surprise from my teammates for the most part. I mean, people see me practicing and stuff, but I don’t talk about it too much. My last name isn’t Wonder for no reason.”

  
“O-oh,” Gob stammered. He wondered if he had made a mistake by talking about his programs so openly. “That’s…cool and mysterious.”

  
Tony laughed a little at that. “Thanks. I’m not worried about anyone stealing my programs or anything, they’re just really personal to me, I guess.”

  
“Didn’t you say it was your last season?” Sally said, surprising Gob. He didn’t realize she had been listening to their conversation.

  
“I mean, I said it’ll probably be,” Tony said. “There’s nothing else I really feel like I need to accomplish. But ask me again at the end of the season.”

  
“I guess I always thought you’d go for a long time. What are you gonna do after you retire?” Sally asked, momentarily distracted from Tony’s reply when the waiter brought their food.

  
In-between bites, Tony said, “I dunno. I don’t think ahead that far.” Sally rolled her eyes.

“What! It’s not like I could’ve kept going for another decade. No one really does. Brian Orser retired after, what, 8 years?”

  
That piqued Gob’s interest. “Yeah, but Orser did like, ice shows and stuff after that.” He knew these things—he still remembered the first time he saw Orser perform on TV and was absolutely mesmerized. Gob envied the presence he had on the ice, the way every move had so much purpose and beauty.

  
“That’s true, but I think he’s fully retired now,” Sally said. “Especially after the whole gay thing came out.”

  
“What? Gay thing?”

  
Tony raised an eyebrow. “You didn’t hear about that? He was getting sued by his ex or something and everyone found out he was gay.”

  
“Oh,” Gob said, not sure what else to say.

  
“It doesn’t surprise me,” Sally added, with a look that distinctly reminded Gob of his mother. “I bet there’s a lot of gay men in figure skating, but no one ever really talks about it.” For some reason, Tony crossed his arms and looked away at that comment. The conversation shifted, but Gob was confused at how stiff and uncomfortable Tony had become.

* * *

  
When they got back to the hotel room, Tony took a shower. Gob usually took his in the morning, so the arrangement worked out well. When Tony got out of the shower and opened the bathroom door, Gob was hit by a wave of heat and a smell that was sweet and musky at the same time. Tony wore only a robe, and something about the sight of his toned legs and messy wet hair made Gob shift a little in his seat. A tinny ringing sound came from beneath a pile of Tony’s clothes and he started searching. He found his phone, then sat on the bed across from Gob when he answered it. “Hello? Oh, hey, Ma. Yeah, I’m in Colorado. Nah, it’s not that cold. I dunno what channel it’s gonna be on, NBC or somethin’. On Friday, yeah. Yeah, I’m fine. I’m feeling fine.

  
“Yeah, I’m stayin’ in a hotel with a roommate. He’s really nice, don’ worry about it. Is he a good skater? Yeah, yeah, he’s real good. Watch for him on Friday, yeah? His name’s Gob. Yeah, like the guy in the Bible. Real good guy. Aw, ma, I ain’t nice, I’m just saying…”  
Gob felt bad for eavesdropping, so he turned on his side so his back was to Tony. He tried not to chuckle at his accent; it was an accent Gob couldn’t place, but something about it appearing out of the blue was so funny. It seemed like it got stronger as the conversation went on.

  
“Aw, ma, I’m tellin’ ya…you don’t haf’ta worry. I’m an adult. Yeah, yeah, I’ll always be your little boy, I know. Ain’t it gettin’ late there, ma? Get to sleep, a’ight? Yeah, I will too. I love ya, too, ma. Bye.” Tony sighed and hung up the phone, grabbing his pajamas and going to the bathroom to change. “Sorry, my ma called and y’know how it is,” he said, the accent still lingering.

  
“I don’t really know how it is, but that’s okay. Was she excited for you?” Gob asked.

  
Tony nodded. “More worried, I think. I told you how much she worries, yeah?”

  
“Because you live so far away.”

  
“Yeah. I get it, I guess, but also…” he shrugged. “I’m doing fine.” He got in the bed, pulling the covers around him and staring up at the ceiling.

  
There was a moment of silence before Gob asked, “Did you mean what you said? That I was a good skater and really nice and stuff?” He felt so juvenile and stupid, like a kid at a sleepover desperate to be liked by the cooler, older kid. Tony turned his head to look him in the eyes.  
“Yeah, of course. I wouldn’t lie to my own mother,” he said with a smirk. “You’re great. I’m not gonna lie and say you’re not just because we’re competition.”

  
Gob felt himself grin like a dope, like a kid who had finally gotten into the popular crowd. A small part of him was ashamed and embarrassed, but he was too happy to think of that part as much. “God, thanks, that’s nice of you.”

  
Tony smiled back. “Can I turn the lamp off?” Gob nodded, and then there was darkness and the humming sound of the room heater. After a few moments of silence, Gob had to ask a question that was nagging at him.

  
“Tony, you kind of have an accent, don’t you?”

  
He heard Tony shuffle around in bed and chuckle. “Yeah, yeah, I’m from New York. Try not to tell anyone about it, yeah?”

  
“I’ll do my best,” Gob said. They both laughed.

* * *

  
After an uneventful but productive practice day, the day of the short program had arrived. Gob was in the first group of men; Tony was in the second. As the first group warmed up, Gob looked around at the audience (hoping his coach didn’t notice he was distracted). It wasn’t a full house—these things never were. But it was decent. No one in his family was there. They never were. And that was fine. He always told himself it was fine, anyway. Eventually they cleared the ice and got ready for the first competitor, a skater from Russia. Gob sat with the other skaters from the US, next to Tony.

  
“You’re going third, right?” Tony whispered to him. Gob nodded. “Are you ready?”

  
“How the hell am I supposed to know?” Gob replied. Tony smirked.

  
“I think once you get on the ice, you’ll know. Good luck. Don’t stress too much.”

  
“Thanks.”

  
The first two skaters flew by; Gob was too lost in his own thoughts. Before he knew it, he was walking up to the rink, looking Aleks in the eye and nodding, and skating onto the ice. The booming, omnipresent voice announced his arrival: “Ladies and gentlemen, representing the United States of America…Gawb Bluth!” He grimaced internally, when were they going to stop pronouncing his name like that? He put on the brightest smile he could, ignoring that it felt strained.

  
When his routine started, Gob felt everything else melt away. He tried not to look at the crowd, or his coach watching him, or Tony, or anything. He thought about what he remembered from West Side Story, Tony and Maria holding each other as if nothing else mattered in the world—as if them being separated was the worst thing that could happen. He prepared for a triple Salchow, and the liftoff was fine, but he ended up crashing on his ass during the landing. _Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck_ , his mind screamed. But he got back up and kept skating, like you were supposed to. He wasn’t hurt, he fell on his ass all the time. He was angry, though; he had told himself this wasn’t going to happen.

  
He tried, again, to put himself in the scene, to flow with the music. He couldn’t imagine himself holding anyone like that. There was no girl in his life he had ever yearned for like that. He landed his next jump fine, a little stiffly, but fine. At this point, it was just about getting through the program. The rest of the jumps were fine, but he noticed every imperfection as soon as he landed them. An under rotation here. Shaky landing there. On one jump, his hand hit the ice when he had to prevent himself from falling again. He finished the program with a smile, but he wasn’t happy. And he knew Aleks wasn’t going to be happy. And Tony would probably laugh in his face.

  
When he hit his ending pose, the cheers fell on deaf ears. He skated off to meet Aleks, who looked concerned. “Are you alright?” he asked.

  
Gob nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

  
“It wasn’t bad at all,” his coach said, handing Gob his skate guards. They made their way to the kiss and cry, and when they passed by Tony, he gave Gob a smile that Gob weakly returned.

“Why are you so upset?” Aleks whispered to him as they sat down.

  
“I thought I was more prepared,” Gob shrugged.

  
“It is first competition,” Aleks said, resting a comforting hand on Gob’s back. “I think you did fine job.”

  
The booming voice said, “The scores, please,” and Gob exhaled deeply. “Gawb Bluth has earned, for technical elements….5.5, 5.4, 5.7, 5.3, 5.3, and 5.2.” Aleks nodded as he looked at the scores, and Gob didn’t feel as heavy of a pit in his stomach as there was before. They rattled off the presentation scores, which were pretty similar, if a little lower to his technical. Then the voice said, “He is currently in first place, and this is a new season’s best.” Gob smiled, still a little sadly, but at least it was a genuine smile.

  
“Good job,” Aleks rubbed his back as they stood up. “We will work on this program more.”

  
Gob resumed his spot next to Tony when he got back from the kiss and cry. Tony was grinning. “That was actually really good. Something I hadn’t seen from you. Yeah, it wasn’t as polished as it could be, but it’s also only October. Good job.”

  
Gob’s face was heating up rapidly, though he wasn’t sure why. “You don’t have to praise me so much…I’m your competition.”

  
Tony laughed. “I don’t have to, but I want to. You deserve it.”

  
“Th-thanks,” Gob stammered, looking away almost shyly.

* * *

  
They got back to the hotel later than expected. There were more skaters to watch and media to talk to, and they all went out to dinner again afterwards. After the short, Gob was in third place, a Russian skater was in second, and Tony was in first. His performance had been stellar, so it seemed that no one was surprised. Gob didn’t feel any sort of jealousy, even though he wondered if he should.

  
Gob and Tony were settling into his bed, the evening news playing in the background, when Gob’s phone rang. He picked it up, wondering if it was Lindsay or Michael calling to say something. “Hello?”

  
“Gob,” his mother said. “I watched you on TV.”

  
Jesus Christ, Gob thought. “Oh. Okay. Thanks.”

  
“Not your best, hmm? That fall at the beginning was abysmal. Are you alright?” she asked. It was such fake concern. Gob knew she wouldn’t care if he broke his ass.

“Yeah, mom, I’m fine,” he replied.

  
“I’m surprised you were in third. Were the judges biased towards Americans? Did you slip them some money?”

  
“Oh my God, that’s illegal, mother.”

  
He could hear the clinking of his mother’s martini glass on the other end. “Well, you’re up against that other American. I’m sure you know there’s very slim chance for you.”

  
“You know, if you’re just calling to criticize, don’t call at all. Or watch,” Gob’s voice rose, and he could feel Tony’s eyes on him. “I know I didn’t do very well, but I tried at least, okay? You’d say all this stuff if I had a perfect performance.”

  
“I’m simply trying to help,” Lucille said dryly. “I’m surprised you’ve gotten this far, if I’m honest. But it’s better than those stupid magic tricks you did in high school, so I guess paying for lessons all this time was worth something.”

  
“Glad to know I wasn’t a total waste of time. I have to go to bed, mom. I have to skate tomorrow. Bye.” He hung up without getting a response out of her. He didn’t look at Tony, though he could still tell Tony was looking at him.

  
Gob rummaged around for his lighter and cigarettes and went out on the balcony, even thought it was too cold to be standing outside in thin pajamas. He lit a cigarette and let the burn and the rush of nicotine envelope him. His eyes stung, but he didn’t cry. He didn’t let his mom make him cry anymore.

  
“Hey, Gob?” Tony’s soft voice made him jump.

  
“Y-yeah?” he replied, still not turning around.

  
“Your mom treats you like shit.”

  
“Thanks, Captain Obvious,” Gob said, then immediately regretted it. “I mean—”

  
Tony shook his head, cautiously walking up to stand by Gob. “It’s okay. I’m sorry.”

 

  
“You don’t have to be sorry. I’m used to it.”  
“I feel…mad that she treats you like that,” Tony said. “Do you need to talk or anything?”  
He shook his head and remained silent. Tony placed a tentative hand on his back, eventually wrapping an arm around his shoulder. “Is this alright? I thought maybe this would help…”  
Gob nodded, feeling one tear roll down his cheek and swiping it away. They stood like that, not saying anything, for several minutes. Gob realized no one had touched him in such a caring way in years. Aleks gave him little pats on the back occasionally, but this was different. The way Tony squeezed his shoulder and looked up at him with such a purely concerned look stirred something in Gob that he didn’t understand. But he was happy that he didn’t feel so completely alone anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry i got really melodramatic and angsty at the end there. i can't help myself i guess. thank you as always for reading xoxox


	4. October 25, 2000

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi, sorry for the bit of a wait with this chapter. i hope that it's not too boring and that you're all still enjoying it! thank you for the comments and feedback as always

Gob woke up before the 7 AM alarm. He looked over at Tony, who was still asleep, snoring softly. Gob knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep anymore, so he got out of bed and padded across the floor to make some shitty instant coffee. Once he had put in enough creamer and sugar, he took his cup to the bathroom and got ready for his shower. He took a quick shower, not wanting to stay in too long and let his mind wander farther than it needed to. He was nervous, even though he had practiced his long program an endless amount of times. It was his usual stuff—flashy and dramatic and fast. He was confident about his free program yesterday, but now there was a pit of doubt in his stomach.

He got out of the shower and wrapped a robe around himself, bringing his coffee cup back into the hotel room. Tony was awake now, albeit sleepy-looking. “Hey Gob. How are you?” he asked, a certain hesitation to his voice that Gob knew was because of what had happened the night before.

“I’m tired. You?”

“Me too, but I need to wake up,” Tony rubbed his eyes, “I wanna do well on my long program. My mom is probably so anxious to watch me skate, even though it’s just on TV.”

Gob smiled. “She probably doesn’t have much to worry about that. You’re gonna do well.”

Tony got up to make himself some coffee as well. “You’re way too nice to me.”

"I mean, I could say the same…thanks for…being there for me last night,” Gob rummaged through his suitcase, looking for his tracksuit to wear to the rink. Turning his back to Tony, he slipped his boxers and sweatpants on under his robe. “No one’s, um, ever done that for me. Not even my brothers, or sister.” He wasn’t sure why he was telling Tony this, but he would’ve felt like an asshole if he didn’t at least thank him.

He heard Tony stirring his coffee as he said, “It’s no big deal. I could tell your mom was saying really nasty stuff to you and…you don’t deserve that, you know?”

Gob shrugged his shirt on. “I guess I know that. Sometimes. It doesn’t matter.”

“I didn’t want you to feel alone. I would’ve felt like a dumbass if I just left you alone in that situation. I know that sounds selfish but…”

He turned to face Tony. “It doesn’t sound selfish. Thanks again. But don’t worry too much about me. She’s said way worse.”

“I’d like you to meet my mom sometime. She can be overbearing, but she’s alright for the most part. And I’m sure she’s glad that I’m finally making actual friends in LA,” Tony laughed.

Gob nodded. “That doesn’t sound so bad. Tell her to come out sometime.”

“Or you could come visit my family with me. You ever been to New York?” Tony asked, the accent slowly creeping into his voice as he talked about his hometown.

“No, I haven’t traveled much,” Gob admitted. “I mean, I’ve been to Mexico a few times, because before I was 21 they like, _never_ checked IDs, but—”

Tony shook his head. “I still don’t know how you’re alive.”

“We need to work on upping your alcohol tolerance.”

Tony scoffed, taking a big gulp of coffee. “Absolutely not. Two glasses of red wine is enough for me these days.” He walked over to grab his clothes, taking off his pajama top and searching through his suitcase, unabashedly shirtless in front of Gob. Gob tried hard not to stare, but after a few shocked moments he couldn’t help but let his eyes wander to Tony’s back. He was more muscly than Gob would’ve expected. It was kind of attractive.

Wait. What? No it wasn’t. Gob wasn’t into girls with muscles. And Tony wasn’t a girl. Tony was very much a guy. And Gob wasn’t into guys. Sure, there were a few drunken makeouts at parties in high school and _yeah,_ his first group of friends when he was a young adult was a group of gay strippers. But that really didn’t mean anything. He turned on his heel, focusing on a wall instead of Tony’s bare back. “What are you feeling for breakfast?” the still-shirtless man asked.

“Um, I don’t usually eat breakfast.”

“Well, you’re going to today.”

“You sound like my mother…if I had a mother who cared about me.” Gob expected that to get a laugh from Tony, but he just made a displeased noise. “Anyway…I think there’s a breakfast bar downstairs.”

“Alright. Let’s go down there before we have to practice,” Tony said. He had a tight, upset expression on his face, and Gob felt guilty about bringing up his mom again, even though he didn’t get why it bothered Tony so much.

* * *

Tony and Gob were both in the second group of the day, due to their higher scores on the short program. In fact, Gob was the second to last to skate (Tony was last, of course). When he skated out onto the ice, he tried to picture Freddie Mercury onstage, at Live Aid, the video of which Gob had watched probably 20 times. He had never worried, though, if Freddie was nervous until now. What was going on in his brain when a million people were watching him? Obviously, a million people weren’t watching Gob, but it felt like that. But the music was starting, and he couldn’t afford to be lost in his head anymore. Maybe that’s what Freddie thought, too.

This program was Gob’s passion project, and it showed when he skated. About a minute in, he felt his lips curve into a smile naturally, giving the judges a wink as he glided past them. He felt himself falling in love with the program all over again as he landed every jump and heard the audience cheer. Even though his free program was almost 4 minutes, it felt shorter, and even when he struck the final pose and heard the audience cheer, he didn’t want it to end. He bowed deeply, skating away quickly to a grinning Aleks. “Wonderful!” he shouted, and Gob laughed out of sheer happiness.

“Speaking of Wonder,” he heard Tony’s voice next to him, and turned around, only to be pulled into a hug. Gob freezed, but hugged him back after a moment. “Proud of you, man.”

"Thank you,” Gob said, tears filling his eyes. He always assumed that “I love you” were the three magic words, but “proud of you” almost sounded better in this case.

Tony had a stellar free skate too, aside from a stumble during a jump, but it was enough to keep him in first place. Gob, however, rose from third to second. As soon as the event ended, reporters came up to him and Tony to ask a few questions. Gob was used to it by now; when he started, the thought of being interviewed was secretly weird and kind of scary to him. As a kid, usually if he was asked something by the press, it was about his dad.

"So, Gawb,” the interviewer said.

"Um, it’s Gob.”

“Oh, sorry…Gob, how do you feel about your free program?”

Gob bit his lip as he thought. “I feel good. It went…better than I thought I would.”

“You did a great job. You made waves with your ‘Final Countdown’ program last year, do you think your Queen program will have the same affect?”

“I mean, I can’t see the future, but I hope people…like it as much as I do.”

The interviewer grinned, her teeth blindingly white. “And what about your short program? You looked a little more frustrated at the end of that one.”

“Ah, yeah, um…I just hope to…improve. So I’ll practice a lot and…not make stupid mistakes.”

“What about Tony Wonder? We saw you two share a moment after your program today, is the competition vicious?”

Gob tried hard not to scoff. Why would Tony hug him if the competition was _vicious_? Interviewers asked such dumb questions. “Um, I mean…sometimes,” he lied, “But he’s mostly really nice.”

“Since Tony is saying it’s his last season, do you think next season will be your time to shine?”

“Why can’t it be _this_ season?” he asked, feeling that it was a fair question.

She laughed. “So the competition _is_ pretty vicious. We look forward to seeing more of you this season, Gob, thanks for talking to us.”

“Thank you.”

Tony came up to him a few minutes later. “What did they ask you?”

“Oh, just the normal stuff,” Gob said, “Did they already talk to you?”

“Yeah. They asked me about you, actually. They asked if I felt worried because of how well you did…they also asked if I thought you might take the gold next time.”

“And you said…?”

Tony chuckled sheepishly. “A little.” Gob nudged him.

“That was a really good free program though. You got this whole, like, Orser thing going on.”

Tony’s eyebrows shot up. “Wow. Isn’t Orser, like, your idol?” When Gob nodded, he said, “Then I’m really flattered to be compared to him.” Gob turned a little red, secretly amazed that his opinion mattered this much to Tony.

* * *

The competition was over, and Gob had received his silver medal, but there was still the gala tomorrow. Gob had decided to bring back his Final Countdown program for the gala, since the whole purpose of the event was for exhibition and showing off. Also, he couldn’t really think of anything else. Once he got to his and Tony’s hotel room, he flopped down on his bed and sighed. “Tired?” Tony asked.

“Yeah. And it just now hit me.”

“Wanna turn on the radio and…have a few drinks from the minibar?” Tony asked. Gob sat straight up.

“Hell yes,” he said. Tony went over to the minibar, finding small bottles of vodka and rum and whiskey.

“I don’t know what I want,” he said, staring at the small bottles spread out on the table.

“I’ll just drink the whiskey straight,” Gob offered.

Tony laughed. “You’re crazy. Turn on the radio?”

Gob flipped the radio on, cycling through a few stations until he came across a voice he recognized and paused, then grinned when he realized it was Queen. It was a song he hadn’t included in his program; “Killer Queen”. He laid back on the bed, looking up at the ceiling. “What’s this?” Tony asked.

Gob’s face screwed up, vaguely offended. “Um, Queen, duh.”

“Oh. I guess I don’t know this song.” Tony placed a glass of whiskey on Gob’s nightstand, a glass of red wine in his own hand.

Gob sat up again. “This is one of their most famous ones, though, it was their first huge hit.”

Tony looked amused. “You know a lot about Queen?”

“Absolutely. They’re the best. Freddie had…the most amazing voice ever. Everyone knows that,” Gob felt like he was 14 again, and back then he’d raved to anyone who would listen about this new band he had just discovered. “He was so confident.”

“I guess I just don’t know much about them,” Tony said, taking a sip of his wine.

“We need to find a copy of _Night at the Opera_ and listen to it as soon as possible,” Gob said, determined. “It’s, like, the best album of all time.”

“Alright, I’ll listen to it with you. Freddie Mercury…he died of AIDS, right? I remember hearing about it.”

Gob sagged a little, like he always did when he remembered Freddie’s death. He had been 16 when it happened, and he had fought back tears for most of the day until he went to bed and finally felt safe enough to sob. “Yeah, he did.”

“I remember some of the people I…hung around with, they liked him, and it was pretty sad because…you know.”

Gob gave Tony a confused look. “What’s that mean?”

“Oh, you know AIDS, it affects a certain demographic a lot here in America, and—”

He gulped down some whiskey. “Explain what you mean in plain English.”

Tony hesitated for a long moment before finally saying, “I’m gay, Gob.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hopefully that isn't a horrible place to end lmao thank u for reading xoxox


	5. October 25, 2000 (continued)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi everyone, thanks for the sweet comments last chapter :) hopefully this one isn't too boring, as it's mostly talking, but i promise i have *really* exciting things planned for next chapter!

Gob stared wordlessly at Tony for a few moments, not really sure how to reply to what he had just told him. “Oh. You are? Really?”

Tony nodded, looking a bit amused, as if he was wondering why he would lie about something like that. “Yeah, I am.”

“I didn’t know. Sh-should I have known? Like—”

He shook his head. “Gob, it’s okay. I just thought you _should_ know because…I guess I consider you a friend.”

That made Gob smile. He couldn’t remember the last time he had been called anyone’s friend. “Thanks, Tony. And-and if you’re gay, I don’t care! I used to know these guys, called the Hot Cops and _they_ were all gay, and they were great! Everyone loved them!” He didn’t mention the fact that they were a stripper troupe that he also happened to be apart of, but…it was a minute detail, really.

"Oh, I think I remember seeing ads for them. The strippers? How did you get involved with strippers?” Tony laughed.

Gob paled. “Oh, y’know. You go to parties, you meet people.”

“Well, thanks for being so cool about it. I just I always saw you as like…a womanizer, aside from your thing for Freddie Mercury.”

“Um, straight people can like Queen too,” Gob insisted.

Tony raised his hands up. “Sure, sure. I’m not saying they can’t.”

“So, why don’t you have a boyfriend?” Gob asked. “Too busy with everything else?”

“I guess so,” Tony replied. “I’ve had a few, here and there.”

“So when you retire you’re gonna settle down?” Gob didn’t know why he was asking all these questions. He didn’t usually get so invested in other people’s lives; he wanted to know everything about Tony, though. Maybe it was to make up for all the times he had rambled on about something to him, but Gob did that to everybody…and like Tony said, they were friends. Even when Gob caught himself looking at Tony and noticing that his eyes were a nice blue color, or that his back was toned and muscular…he had noticed those things about several men, usually when he really wanted to be friends with them.

Tony thought on that question. “I mean, yeah, I’ll settle down, but probably not with anyone. But…who knows what’ll happen.”

“Are you afraid it’ll ruin your career if you come out? Because Brian Orser is gay, and everyone still loves him.”

He laughed. “No, not really. I just don’t want my picture to be on the news with the head line ‘Guy who does the fruitiest possible sport comes out as a fruit’.”

“Wait, do your parents not know?”

“Oh, they do. I told them a couple years ago. They were nice about it, and I have brothers, so they weren’t worried about the family line dying out or anything.”

“That’s good,” Gob said, “Brothers are the worst, though.”

Tony’s smile didn’t reach his eyes. “They can be, yeah. I mean, my older brother married a really conservative lady who didn’t really like hearing that I was gay. My younger brother…” he sighed and let the sentence drift away into the air.

Gob, ever nosy, pressed further. “Did he not come around to it either?”

“No, he was nice about it. He, uh, passed away last year.”

Gob froze. “Oh,” was all he could say. He was never good when it came to death—there had been so few in his own family, and no one seemed to care when they did happy. “I’m…really sorry.”

Tony sighed. “It’s fine. I mean, it’s not…fine, but it’s fine. It’s gotten better in the past year, for me at least. My mom still cries a lot, still thinks of him a lot…I mean, he was her baby.”

Gob put two and two together. “Is that why you were gone last year?”

Tony nodded. “Yeah. It didn’t feel right to just abandon my family and keep skating and pretend everything was alright. I don’t think I would’ve done well, anyway. I didn’t tell anyone because I figured it wasn’t anyone’s business. God, I’m telling you a lot tonight. I didn’t mean to…metaphorically spill my guts.”

“It’s okay, I’m glad you told me actually. It makes me feel like you actually like me and I’m not just some annoying guy you have to room with.”

Tony stood up to get himself some water. “You worry a lot about what other people think of you, don’t you?”

“N-no,” Gob said. Tony didn’t reply, but Gob could hear a chuckle. “Maybe sometimes.”

“I like you, Gob. Don’t worry,” the softness in Tony’s voice gave Gob’s chest a pang that he wasn’t used to. “I should get some sleep, though.”

“Yeah. Same. To both things.”

Gob slept more soundly than he had the previous nights, but he kept hearing Tony say that he liked him in his head. It was so nice to feel liked, but so overwhelming at the same time.

* * *

The gala went off without a hitch, and the audience loved Gob’s Final Countdown program. Tony’s exhibition piece was absolutely mindblowing for Gob; he skated to a song from a musical called _The Magic Show_ , and he wore the traditional magician garb, sparkly vest and top hat (which he later threw off) and all. If Gob had seen this program when he was 15, he might’ve just fainted. When Tony concluded his program, Gob stood up and clapped hard. He decided then and there that Tony and he would’ve _definitely_ been friends in high school.

When they were waiting in the airport later that evening, Gob finally got the chance to gush to Tony about it. “That was such a cool idea, the magician thing.”

Tony laughed softly. “Thanks. I was worried it would be dorky, but most people seemed to like it.”

“I know I did. And magic isn’t dorky… _I_ did magic in high school, you know.”

“You did? Same!” he grinned. “I mean, it all started when I saw the movie _The Magic Show_ , with Doug Henning, have you seen that?” When Gob shook his head, Tony gasped. “Oh my God, Gob. We are sitting down and watching _The Magic Show_ as soon as possible.”

“Okay, I’ll watch that if you watch Queen’s performance at Live Aid with me. _And_ listen to _A Night at the Opera._ ”

Tony shook his head, but kept smiling. “Of course, of course.”

When they boarded the plane, Tony looked like he was thinking of something from the way his brow was furrowed. “Gob?” he asked. “What are you doing, y’know, for the holidays?”

“Like, Christmas? Nothing.”

"Your family doesn’t get together or anything?”

“I mean, sometimes my mom has Christmas parties, but she gets mad when I show up to those, so I probably won’t go this year. What about you? Going back to New York?”

Tony nodded, but didn’t say anything for a few more minutes, still wearing that pensive look. “Why don’t you…come spend the holidays with my family?”

“You don’t have to do that—I know you’re sympathetic about my whole family… _thing_ , and—”

“It’s not about sympathy, really. Well, maybe it is,” he replied, voice going down to a hush as the pilot droned on about the predicted time of arrival in California. “I just don’t want you spending your Christmas in a bar somewhere, alone.”

“Still, I…won’t your parents care?”

Tony shrugged. “I’m an adult, for one thing, and I can bring whoever I damn please. And my mom’s always on my ass about making friends.”

“I’ve never been to New York.”

“I know,” he reassured Gob. “You’d have me around, it’s not like you’d be alone in the city. My parents don’t even _live_ in the city. Listen, I’m not trying to pressure you…”

“Sir, can you put your tray up?” the flight attendant asked Tony. Tony nodded quickly and complied before continuing.

“Just, think about it okay? And I know you’re not Jewish, so you don’t have to _do_ any of the Hanukkah stuff, but we’d still feed you and give you a place to sleep and…a family to keep you company.”

“You’re Jewish?” Gob asked.

Tony raised an eyebrow. “Yeah. Did I never tell you?” When Gob shook his head, he said, “I mean, I thought it was obvious from the…everything about me. But, I guess there aren’t as many Jews in California compared to New York…”

“All I really know about Jewish people is from what my parents say about them.”

“Which is?” Tony asked. Gob stayed silent. “…I thought so.” Tony rolled his eyes, not at Gob but his parents. They  _did_ seem like those type of people.

“I’m not, like, _against_ Jews!” Gob insisted a bit loudly, prompting a weird look from the person across the row.

Tony placed a hand on his shoulder. “I know. I just thought you should know, because Hanukkah is pretty different from Christmas. But it’s a lot of fun, and there’s gonna be lots of good food. Again, no pressure, just…think about it, alright?”

Gob did think as the plane got ready to take off. When they were ascending into the air, he turned to Tony and said. “I’ll come to New York with you. I think…I’d really like that.”

Tony smiled. “I would, too, Gob.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know i've co-written a fic involving blunder and hanukkah, so to avoid redundancy, i won't really focus on hanukkah too much in the next chapter--but like, i said, i have plans ;) thank you so much for reading xoxox


	6. November 23, 2000

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi! this chapter is fairly long but i hope you all still enjoy it. i wrote most of it in one sitting, and i proofread, but if there are typos i apologize.
> 
> thank you all, as always, for the comments. <3

November came and went quickly, a blur of practicing too much and sleeping too little for Gob. There was no Bluth family Thanksgiving—instead, Gob and Tony had a mini celebration in Tony’s small apartment that day. They drank too much red wine (which Gob didn’t really like, but for some reason he wanted to impress Tony, so he drank it anyway until he was tipsy enough to not care about the taste) and watched _The Magic Show_ , which was surprisingly enjoyable. It was even more enjoyable, though, to see Tony mouthing every word of every song along with the movie. Gob didn’t want him to catch him looking, so he’d peek out of the corner of his eye once a song started. “You know, you should be in, like, a remake of this,” he said nonchalantly.

Tony laughed, cheeks flushed from both the wine and compliment. “I can’t really sing that well.”

“Yeah, but you have the charisma.”

Tony brushed off the compliment, but he couldn’t keep the smile off his face for the rest of the movie. When it was over, Gob insisted on watching Queen’s Live Aid performance. “It’s only fair,” he bargained, and Tony didn’t resist. Gob sprawled out on the couch once he put the VHS in, looking at Tony expectantly.

“Wow, there’s so many _people_ there,” Tony observed, fairly drunk.

Gob nodded. “I was a kid when this played on TV.”

“Did you watch it?”

“Yeah…m’ sister was flipping channels and I told her to stop when I saw this, it was so…incredible,” Gob knew how tired and tipsy he sounded, but he couldn’t find the words to describe how he felt when he watched that particular performance.

“He was a great performer,” Tony said. “Could really hold a crowd.”

“Yeah. There’s never gonna be another one of him,” Gob said, his voice cracking before he realized there were tears in his eyes. He didn’t _usually_ cry at this, but with enough wine in his system it was probably inevitable that he’d shed some tears. Tony nodded and remained silent for the rest of the performance, which felt like two hours and two minutes at the same time to Gob. When it ended, he hesitantly looked over to see Tony smiling.

“I get it, man,” he said, “I mean, who else was doing _that_ back then?”     

Gob nodded. “He was amazing.”

“I see where you get your inspiration from. Your presence,” Tony said, sounding tired, but genuine. “When you’re on the ice.”

Gob buried his face in a couch pillow. “I knew you’d like it,” he said with a yawn. Tony chuckled.

“Stay here tonight,” he said.

“Oh, I can sober up real quick. Just gimme some water, and I’ll be sober enough to drive home, I mean it.”

“I don’t doubt that, but still, stay here. Just…to be extra safe.”

This wasn’t the first time Gob had been over to Tony’s apartment, but Tony had never been over to Gob’s, which Gob was barely at himself. Well—maybe more than usual, lately. He hadn’t been waking up to girls he barely knew lately. Not since he met Tony. He hadn’t been rushing to his car and popping pills like tic-tacs lately. Half of that was because Alex would kill him if he was on anything. But, also, there wasn’t anything he desperately wanted to forget anymore.

Not since he got to know Tony.

“You mind sleeping on the couch?” Tony asked. “I don’t have a guest room…a one-bedroom apartment is expensive enough here.”

Gob nodded. “I can sleep on the couch. Y’know how many times I’ve slept on random couches and floors throughout my life?” He laughed, but it was one of those jokes that Tony didn’t find funny, and just frowned at.

"Let me get you some water and blankets and—”

“You’re way drunker than me right now, guy. Don’t worry ‘bout it. Go get some sleep. I’ll take you out for bloody marys in the morning.”

Tony grinned. “At least let me get you a blanket?”

"Okay,” Gob said, but by the time Tony came back with a blanket, he was already asleep.

* * *

December 2000

Aleks had given Gob a few weeks off practice. Trained practice, that was. He wanted him to skate a little bit while he was gone. He had gone to see his family in Russia, for the first time in several years. “You will see your family for Christmas?” he asked Gob.

Gob nodded, but he knew it was probably a lie. “And you will see Tony?” Aleks asked. Gob nodded again. “You know, maybe you two should not be such good friends, but you two make a good pair.”

He didn’t know why he blushed at the idea of being considered a “pair” with Tony. “Don’t worry, we both know we’re each other’s competition.”

Aleks smiled. “It is good to not see you so tired, or frustrated with yourself. It will be good for skating, and also life.”

Gob had to laugh in response. “I didn’t know you were my life coach, too.”

“Well, I am old. So I know some things about life.”

That was the last conversation they had before Aleks went to Russia, and when Gob went home he started packing to fly to New York.

A week later, he was sitting in an airport with Tony, waiting until it was time to board their plane. He was buzzing with excitement and nerves, and he wasn’t sure how much of that came from the iced coffee he was holding in his hand. “Your parents know I’m coming?” he asked Tony.

He nodded. “Yeah, they’re excited to meet you. My mom’s seen you skate, on TV, and says you’re great.”

That got a little smile out of Gob. “I hope I don’t disappoint her, then, it’d be fucked if I made _two_ moms mad at me.” _I gotta stop making jokes like that_ , he thought as soon as he said it and Tony just pulled a face. “Um, so, what do you do on the first day of Hanukkah?”

“Well, we start on sundown on the 21st, so two days from now. We don’t do anything _too_ fancy, just eat a big dinner, light the menorah, and recite a few prayers.”

Gob tensed up when he heard the word “prayer”. “Oh. I don’t really know how to pray.”

Tony chuckled. “Don’t worry. I wouldn’t know them if they weren’t drilled in my head as a kid. You don’t have to pray or anything. They’re in Hebrew, which I assume you don’t know, but you’ve surprised me before.”

“I don’t know Hebrew. I barely remember any Spanish.”

“Really? You live in _Southern California,_ man.”

“So? I’m not saying I showed up to Spanish class all the time.”

When they squeezed onto the airplane in a single file line, Gob mumbled, “Have I mentioned I hate flying?”

“Once or twice. It’s only about five hours, we’ll be there by dinner. And it’ll be a good dinner, too, I promise. When’s the last time you had a proper meal?”

“Don’t ask me dumb questions like that, Tony.” Gob said, and that was enough to give Tony the answer—it had been too long.

* * *

For some reason, Gob could instantly tell which woman waiting at the baggage claim was Tony’s mother. Maybe it was the way she gasped and how her eyes lit up as soon as they glanced in her general direction, or maybe it was her shortness and black hair (though hers was streaked with gray). Either way, she ran to embrace her son tightly the moment she saw him. “Anthony, oh goodness, it’s really been too long!”

“Hey, ma,” Tony said, hugging his mom back and giving her a kiss on the cheek. “This is my friend, Gob Bluth.”

She pulled away from her son to look up at Gob with the warmest smile he had probably ever seen. “What a handsome boy! He’s so _tall_ , Anthony, and so skinny! We need to get some food in you right away!”

Gob blushed. “It’s, um, nice to meet you, Mrs. Wonder.”

“Call me Naomi, won’t you?” she asked, and he nodded. “Alright you two, get your bags, and I promise I have food waiting at home.”

When they got in Naomi’s car, she instantly started up with the questions again. “Anthony, how’s LA? You never call me anymore. How’s practice? Are you taking care of yourself?”

As Tony answered each of his mother’s questions dutifully, Gob let himself look out the window. New York was busy in a different way that LA was busy. Everyone was wearing what looked like five layers of clothing, and barely anyone had a tan. Tony placed a hand on his knee. “You okay?” he asked.

“Oh yeah, just…taking it all in.”

“You’ve never been to New York before?” Naomi asked.

“I’ve barely left California, honestly.”

“We’ll make you feel at home here, dear. I’m so glad Tony has a friend, being so far away and all.”

“Maaa,” Tony groaned, sounding more like a teenager than an almost 30-year-old.

“What?” Naomi said. “California is a big place, and you _are_ my baby now, I get worried!”

He sighed. “I’m doing fine…and I agree, it’s nice to have Gob around. He’s pretty great.” He turned to Gob with a smile and a wink that made Gob look away and blush for like, the fifth time that day.

“You’re a wonderful skater, Gob. Maybe I’m not supposed to say that, with Anthony being my son, but you’re just great to watch.”

Sometimes when Gob got a surplus of compliments, he wondered if they were all genuine. But at this point, he’d believe anything Naomi said to him. His own mother had never complimented him…ever, really. He was overwhelmed with the amount of kindness he’d already been shown, and yet he never wanted to leave. “Thanks. So is Tony, though.”

“Oh, of course, I love watching my son. I get nervous when I watch him, though, you know? I’m sure your parents are the same, just on the edge of their seat whenever you skate…”

“Ma,” Tony said again, sharper this time. “You’re rambling.”

Naomi got off the freeway and cruised into a more suburban area. “Oh, don’t be so bossy, Anthony.”

Gob knew Tony had scolded his mom because he knew that Gob’s parents didn’t care about how he skated, how they probably took a slight pleasure in him falling and failing. “Just give Gob a minute every now and then, Ma, to breathe at least.”

She sighed. “Alright, alright. Sorry, Gob, I get excited whenever my son comes home.”

“I get it,” Gob said, though he didn’t really have any experience of his parents being excited for him in any capacity. But he understood it. He _thought_ he understood that. Naomi pulled up to a house that looked surprisingly milquetoast compared to what Gob expected from New York, though this was the middle-class suburbs and Gob was from Southern California where painting your house “uncommon” colors wasn’t really uncommon at all.

They got their bags out of the car and Naomi ushered them into the house, instructing Tony to show Gob to the guest room. Tony showed him to a room with two twin beds, saying “Thankfully, my parents live in a house with more than one bedroom. I’ll probably sleep in my own room, so this Is all yours.”

“Thanks, Tony,” Gob said.

“Are you hungry? Actually, don’t answer that. My mom is already upstairs making plates of food for us.”

He chuckled. “Well, I guess I could eat.”

“Come on, then.”

As soon as they got to the kitchen, they were presented by two plates full of food. “Both you boys are so skinny, I just _had_ to make you a meal.”

“Where’s the latkes, ma?” Tony asked, smirking when his mom made a face at him.

"Every year you do this. I make you a whole plate and you say ‘what about the latkes?’. Can’t you wait a few days, til the rest of the family is here, _bubbeleh?_ ”

"I’m just yankin’ your chain, ma. And don’t call me _bubbeleh,_ I’m a grown man.”

“You work your whole life for your children and this is what you get,” Naomi grumbled, but something about it seemed good natured to Gob. She sat down with a cup of coffee and watched as the two of them ate quickly, both of them hungrier than they thought they were. “Where’s dad?” Tony asked with his mouth full.

“Your father was out with some friends today and as soon as he came home, he fell asleep, like such an old man,” she laughed good-naturedly. “I figured I wouldn’t wake him up, he sleeps so heavy. You’ll see him in the morning.”

Tony nodded. “That sounds good. He’s grumpy when he gets woken up anyway.”

“Oh! And, Adam and Rachel are coming tomorrow,” Naomi said. Her son did not look thrilled.

“That’s good,” he said with no inflection. “Adam knocked her up, didn’t he?”

“Is this how people talk in California?”

Tony snorted. “It’s actually worse over here, but _sorry_. I'll modify my language. She’s pregnant?”

“Yes, very much so. I think they’re having a girl.”

“Adam’s your brother?” Gob asked.

Tony nodded. “He’s fine. I mean, he’s the older brother and you know how older brothers are—wait, you’re the oldest.”

“The worst, right?” Gob shot back.

“Sometimes,” Tony winked, and it made Gob squirm in his seat.

Naomi stopped the interrogating, simply listening to her son and Gob make conversation as they finished dinner. “You two must be tired,” she commented, once they had finished their meal.

Tony nodded. “I am, actually. I think I’m gonna go to bed.”

“Aren’t you gonna say goodnight to your mother?” Naomi called behind him as he put his plate in the dishwasher, and he came back to give her a kiss on the cheek.

“’Night, ma, sleep well. You, too, Gob, okay? Lemme know if you need anything?” Tony said

“Yes, of course,” Naomi said, “I’m here as well.”

When Gob went to bed, he laid awake for at least an hour, staring at the ceiling. Every word that Naomi had said cycled through his head, how she had called him handsome and tall and skinny. How she had fed him a homecooked meal and smiled and nodded when he talked. Just like Tony did. How both her and her son had said that they were there if he needed anything, and how they _meant_ it. He felt wanted and full for the first time in what felt like ten years, or maybe even a lifetime. He shook a little, a tear rolling down his cheek for reasons he was unsure of. Maybe it was because he wasn’t used to it, and he didn’t know what he had done to deserve it. He felt _loved_ , and he loved them back, too.

He loved Tony, too.

How he loved Tony, he didn’t know. And that was what was making him cry.

* * *

Gob woke up at 8, which was kind of early, he guessed. But he didn’t have a sleep schedule, and never had, so he didn’t pay it much mind. He could smell breakfast all the way from the guest room, and instantly sat up, his stomach growling. He didn’t know _how_ he was hungry, considering how much he ate last night. Maybe Naomi’s food had an addictive chemical in it or something.

When he walked down the hall, he heard Tony’s forceful voice saying “Ma, you really ain’t gotta _worry_ about this stuff.” Gob stopped in his tracks.

“It’s not that I’m worried—well, I am. It’s not that I want you to get a boyfriend, I just…worry you might be lonely. Wouldn't you get lonely?”

He could practically see Tony shrugging at that. “I’m not lonely, and if it was, I’d just go out to a bar or something.”

“You know, you haven’t been to the Motzo Ball since you were a boy. You should this year, they have ones just for gay people now!”

Gob wasn’t sure what a Motzo Ball was (he thought it was soup, or something…?) but it apparently wasn’t Tony’s thing by the way he groaned. “I’m way too old for that, Ma.”

“Just think about it, alright? Maybe?”

“Ma, I ain’t gonna go.”

She sighed. “Alright…maybe I’m just being selfish. I want some more grandkids.”

“You’re not selfish. I’m sure Adam and Rachel will give your lots of grandkids.”

“I guess that’s true. I think I’ve just been lonely. Your father’s around, but you and Adam haven’t really been around, and ever since…Andrew it’s just been so…oh, I don’t know,” Gob could hear Naomi’s voice break, and he suddenly felt guilty for listening in.

“Ma…Ma, it’s okay. I miss him too.”

“I’m sorry for taking down all the pictures of him, but it’s so hard, to see his face when I walk in and…” she sniffled, and Gob went to the bathroom to at least give her some privacy with her son.

When he came back, walking into the kitchen this time, Naomi still had Tony in a tight embrace. “Oh, hi, Gob,” she said, pulling away and wiping her eyes.

“Sorry,” Gob began, but she waved her hand as if to tell him to pay it no mind.

“It’s alright. I got a little sentimental, I think,” she laughed weakly. “I’m sure your mom does, too.”

_Not unless she’s thinking about when Nixon was president,_ Gob thought, but was (for once) smart enough not to say it out loud. “Uh, not usually, but she’s not a very sentimental person.”

“It’s not always a good thing,” Naomi admitted, “But I can’t help it.”

“That’s okay. I can get like that, too, I guess,” Gob said. He wasn’t sure what other word he would use to describe his feelings about Freddie Mercury, after all.

She wiped her eyes one more time, taking a deep breath. “Anyway. Would you like some breakfast? I made eggs, and bagels, and coffee.”

“That sounds good,” a voice from behind Gob said, and he jumped.

“Morning, dad,” Tony said. “You scared my friend.”

Tony’s dad walked over to the coffee machine with a lopsided smile ( _same as Tony’s_ , Gob thought). “Sorry. Morning, Gob. I’m sorry we didn’t get to meet last night. I’m Daniel.”

Gob shook his hand, still thinking that Tony got a _perfect_ mixture of both his mom and dad’s genes. Neither of them were very tall—Jewish thing, maybe?—but they both had the dark hair and Daniel had the same light eyes that Tony did, that Gob thought about a lot for some reason. Daniel wore glasses, like Gob’s own dad, but it made him look warm and friendly, as opposed to George Sr.’s cold, distant look. “Hi, I’m Gob,” he managed to say once he got his mind off Tony’s eyes.

He laughed. “I know. I’ve seen you skate, quite a bit. You’re very good!”

“Oh, thanks. So’s Tony.”

“I know about that, too, but I’m a little biased,” Daniel said, accepting a plate of breakfast from his wife. He went to sit down at the table, and before Gob could turn around Naomi was putting a cup of coffee in one of his hands and a plate in his other.

“Go. Sit. Eat.” She said. Gob laughed, but he wasn’t going to argue with her. The food looked great.

* * *

December 31, 2000

Hanukkah was half-confusing, half-enlightening for Gob. Not that he wanted to convert to Judaism or anything, it was just kind of fun to eat good meals every night and light candles and get little presents. To his surprise, Naomi had gotten Gob a few gifts, one of them being a tie with ice skates on it. He barely even wore ties, but it was so thoughtful he almost cried.

He had learned a lot about Tony’s family, too. Their last name wasn’t actually Wonder—it was _Wunderlich,_ of all things. Naomi had lamented that Tony changed his name for skating, and Tony had retorted that it was longer than the alphabet. Tony’s brother was nice and laid back, though Tony said (in private) that he was more stressed than usual because his wife was so heavily pregnant. Rachel was nice enough, too, but she seemed uptight, and Gob sensed some sort of rift between her and Naomi. But he would wait until he got back to LA to ask Tony about all that. He had enough drama in his own family, anyway.

It was New Years’ Eve, and him and Tony were out at a bar, away from the Wunderlichs for one of the first times on this vacation. Some of Tony’s old high school friends were there, too, and they all knew Gob from watching Tony skate. “You’re really good!” one of Tony’s friends, Angie, had said. “Oh, wait, should I not say that?”

Tony rolled his eyes. “You can say he’s good, I won’t cry.”

It was an awkward atmosphere at first, but once everyone got a few drinks in them, they spoke much more freely and got on the dance floor. Gob had forgotten how fun it was to dance, even if he wasn’t grinding up against a woman. “Guys, guys, the countdown is about to start,” Angie yelled, gesturing them over to the bar, where there was a large TV set up. Bartenders were handing out sparklers, which was probably a huge fire hazard, but Gob hadn’t seen one of these since he was a kid on the 4th of July. He waved his around, smiling so hard his warm cheeks hurt.

“Five! Four!” everyone chanted, rowdy and drunk, some still dancing. When they got down to one, the whole bar performed an off-key rendition of Auld Lange Syne—at least those who weren’t already sucking face. Tony gave all his friends a hug and brief, friendly kisses to the girls. A few drunk girls even pulled Gob in for a kiss. They weren’t good kisses, of course, but Gob didn’t know why he didn’t like them. Usually he would take a kiss no matter his level of sobriety. When he turned around, still gripping his sparkler, Tony was facing him. Everyone was singing Auld Lang Syne still and lights were sparkling everywhere but he was just staring at Tony’s lips. Gob _knew_ what he wanted to do, but he couldn’t push himself forward, he couldn’t lean down and press his lips against Tony’s.

Instead, Tony stood up on his tiptoes and gave Gob a kiss on the cheek. “Happy New Year, Gob.”

“Happy New Year, Tony,” Gob said, trying to mask the disappointment in his voice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hopefully this chapter wasn't *too* rambly...things are coming to a turning point, y'all!!
> 
> oh, the final scene in this chapter is based off the new years' eve scene from the figure skating romantic comedy called the cutting edge, which is pretty corny, but i loved it when i was in middle school. if you haven't seen it...you're probably not missing much, but it's still a cute movie.


	7. January 5, 2001

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi! sorry it's been awhile since the last update. i got pretty busy with other writing projects--all academic, and none of them fun. i hope this chapter is worth the wait. 
> 
> a few notes:  
> -unfortunately, i had an error on the figure skating grand prix schedule. technically, the grand prix events end before the new year, which an event held every weekend. i, for some reason, totally messed up the schedule, so the events are going to be a little bit later in this fic than they would be IRL. this doesn't really matter to most people reading this fic, i hope, but if you're a figure skating fan, you'll notice the grand prix event in france is later in the season than it should be lol.  
> -this chapter has nsfw events towards the end...nothing extreme, but something to take note of.  
> -sorry tony isn't in this one as much!  
> i hope you enjoy <3

Gob was back in LA, at the rink. He was watching Sally Sitwell do a perfect spiral. Now that it was the new year, he had to start focusing on the next Grand Prix event. Generally, skaters entered into two Grand Prix events out of the six. Since Gob and Tony had been in Skate America, they entered into the second to last competition of the series, La Trophée Lalique, in France. Gob had never been to France before, and he was both excited and scared. But he had heard French girls were really hot. That was to be at the end of January, and not too long after that was the Grand Prix finals, and US Nationals, and finally, _finally_ World Championships. It was a lot of big events crammed into a short amount of time, and Gob felt tired just thinking about it. It made him feel like such a newbie, compared to Tony—who, if he was exhausted, was damn good at hiding it.

Tony. Gob hadn’t seen Tony since they came back from their trip, right after New Years’. Things weren’t awkward between them, they went on like normal, but Gob wondered if Tony was thinking about that kiss on the cheek as much as he was. It had been a long time since any guy had kissed Gob—he really thought that phase of his life was over. But he kept thinking about Tony’s stubble against his cheek, tickling him and making him shiver. Gob figured that he was just sexually frustrated. _I need to get laid_ , he told himself. But with extra training time, it wasn’t like he wanted to go out alone every night like he used to. Who was there to make conversation with? He had made a few passes at Sally Sitwell, but she always turned up her nose at him, and he figured it would be kind of weird to sleep with her and then see her at practice. After Nationals, he’d get laid…or Worlds, if he got there.

After practice, when Gob was gathering his things, his phone rang. He grinned when he heard Tracey’s voice on the other end. “Hi, Gob. Do you want to have dinner with us tonight?”

“Oh, sure,” he replied. “I’m done with practice now, can I swing by?”

“Of course!” she said in her super-sweet Tracey voice. She wasn’t really Gob’s type (too wholesome), but he could see why Michael was so in love with her. “I’ll have dinner ready.”

“Thank you, Tracey,” he said and hung up. He wasn’t excited to be judged by Michael all evening, but it was better than going to a bar alone or laying in bed, staring at the ceiling and trying not to think of Tony.

* * *

When he arrived at Tracey and Michael’s tiny house in a suburb of the OC, Tracey gave him a hug. “It’s so nice to see you! I know you’ve been so busy with skating. How are you?”

“I’m okay,” Gob said. “Where’s Michael?”

“I think he’s changing out of his work clothes. Come in, I made pasta.”

Gob sat down at the table, where Tracey had already poured three glasses of red wine. “So how was practice? Do you have another competition coming up?”

Gob nodded, watching Michael come down the stairs. “Yeah, at the end of the month, in France.”

“How exciting! I’ve always wanted to go. I’ve barely left the US.”

“We went to Mexico for our honeymoon,” Michael said.

“Mexico is practically in our backyard,” Tracey said, and she had a point. “Aren’t you gonna say hi to your brother?”

Michael rolled his eyes. “Hi, Gob. How’s it going? I haven’t seen you since um…before you left for Colorado.”

Gob took a long sip of his wine, waiting for the warm rush to flood his body and make him feel less awkward; less like he was intruding on Michael’s perfect life, like he always was. “It’s going okay. Did you watch the competition on TV? I know mom did.”

“I did!” Tracey said from the kitchen, putting the pasta on plates. “You were so good! I really like that Tony Wonder guy, too. Do you think that’s his real name? I’ve never met anyone with the last name Wonder.”

Gob thought about telling her that it was a stage name, but he thought that Tony probably wouldn’t like that, so he just shrugged. “I mean, I haven’t looked at his driver’s license or anything.”

“They can’t seem to get your name right,” Michael commented, thanking his wife when she handed him a plate. Gob did the same.

“No one gets it right,” he said, twirling his pasta around on his fork.

"Why don’t you just go by George?” Michael said, but then made a face at his own suggestion. “Actually…the name George doesn’t really fit you, I guess. You’re nothing like dad.”

"Thanks for reminding me, guy. It’s not like I hear it from mom all the time,” he slurped up some pasta, ignoring how hot it was.

“Have you ever met Tony? I think I saw you talking to him at one point during the competition on TV,” Tracey asked, trying to diffuse the tension.

Gob chuckled a little at the question. “Yeah, we’ve hung out…a lot, I guess.”

“That’s so nice! You should bring him around sometime,” Tracey said. Gob wondered what Tony would be like around Michael and Tracey. It seemed Tony got along with most people, but Gob hadn’t always said the nicest things about Michael to him. And every time Gob talked about how his family treated him, Tony got that angry/sad look on his face.

Michael laughed. “Tracey, you would barely be able to speak around him. Remember the time you saw that newscaster in a restaurant and made a scene?”

“I’m not _from_ Southern California, I’m not used to all this,” she said. “I bet you see celebrities all the time.”

“Not in Newport Beach,” Gob said; and if he had seen a celebrity, it barely mattered. They weren’t Freddie Mercury or anything.

“It’s mostly snobby rich people. I mean, remember all of mom’s friends that came to our wedding?” Michael asked, and Tracey grimaced.

“I can’t believe you grew up around those people,” she said, but Gob couldn’t imagine not growing up around rich, snobby assholes. “Is Tony from here?” she asked Gob.

“Gob meets one sorta-famous person and she starts asking all these questions…”

“He went to the Olympics, I think he’s more than _sorta_ famous, Mikey,” Gob said.

“I have never seen you so quick to defend someone who’s your competition,” Michael said.

“What, so I can’t have a friend?”

He scoffed. “No, Jesus, Gob, I’m just _saying—_ ”

“You have to criticize every element of my life, huh?”

Michael groaned. “Why does everything have to be so theatrical with you?”

“At least I’m not a robot, like you,” Gob said through a mouthful of spaghetti, nearly spitting some of it across the table.

Tracey stood up, the scrape of her chair against the floor silencing the two of them. “Gob, would you like some ice cream?”

“I—” he considered being polite, but he hadn’t eaten a proper meal in awhile until today, and he figured that he might as well eat dessert along with it. “Sure. If it’s…not too much trouble and all.”

“Not at all,” she said. “How far away is your apartment from here, Gob?” she asked as she spooned some Ben and Jerry’s into a bowl.

“Oh, like an hour drive? I guess it’s longer with the traffic now. Hour and a half, two hours,” Gob said. The traffic in SoCal seemed to get worse every year—it was pretty much the main topic of small talk. It wasn’t as if there was any change in the weather to talk about.

“That’s really far. Do you wanna stay here tonight? We have a guest room that’s never been stayed in.”

“Tracey—” Michael said, but she shushed him and handed Gob a bowl.

"It’s really not that big of a deal if I get home a little late, I always do after practice anyway.”

“I…guess I could,” Gob said. He didn’t really want to sit in traffic for that long anyway. Michael was a pain in the ass, but he could handle it.

“Michael, can Gob borrow some of your pajamas?”

“They’ll be too short on him, but sure,” Michael smirked. Gob ate his ice cream in less than five minutes. It hadn’t really been that long of a meal, but he was already growing tired of Michael’s comments. At least he could go to bed and stop bothering everyone.

“Can I use your shower?” Gob asked. He didn’t want to get into Michael’s pajamas still slightly sweaty from practice.

“Sure,” Tracey smiled.

“What else do you need? Us to massage your feet for you?” Michael snarked.

“Are you always like this around your brother?” Tracey asked.

Gob laughed. “You’ll get used to it.”

Tracey looked a little concerned, but she still said “I’ll put the pajamas on the guest bed, okay? Have a nice shower.”

Gob went upstairs to the bathroom, stripping out of his wrinkled, old practice clothes and climbing in once he had gotten the water hot enough. He sighed and closed his eyes, leaning against the wall. It was like he had just realized how tired he truly was. There was still a tension in his back and soreness in his legs, even after a few minutes of standing under the hot water and letting his mind go blank. _I guess I could jerk off_ , he thought suddenly. He hadn’t in five days, or something like that. That had to be a record for him. Even when he was away on competition, he made some time alone in the shower to do it. Maybe that was gross, but it’s not like he had been getting laid lately.

It didn’t take him that long to get hard. He thought of the normal things, girls he had seen in bars that he had made out with, some that he had even had one night stands with. But instead of getting him off, the fantasies started fading away and he had a hard time focusing. He groaned. Now he was horny, but he couldn’t get focused on any one fantasy. He stroked himself a few more times, fruitlessly, trying to think of the most attractive person he could think of.

Tony came to mind first. If Gob hadn’t made himself so horny, he probably would’ve been worried. But in the moment, all he was thinking about was Tony’s toned, muscular back. How, when he wore those tight jeans, they strained against his ass when he bent over. Gob would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought of what Tony’s lips would feel like against his; what his tongue would feel like in his mouth. Oh God, Tony’s tongue. Gob was biting his lip to hold back any whimpers, already closer than he thought he would be, stroking himself hard and fast, rolling his hips into his hand.

The moment he thought about Tony’s mouth kissing down his body and taking his dick in his mouth, he jolted and gasped as he came in his hand. It felt like electricity shooting up his spine until he was spent and panting, and he wasn’t sure if the water on his face was from the shower or sweat or both. He quickly scrubbed off and washed his hair, making sure there was no evidence of what he did before he left. With a towel wrapped around his waist, he made his way to the bedroom and changed into Michael’s pajamas Tracey had laid out for him. Michael was right, the pants didn’t even reach his ankles. But it would work.

He got under the covers, exhausted from his activities in the shower. He hoped he could get to sleep quickly without having to think much that he had just _masturbated while thinking of his friend._ He was determined that would be a one time thing. Something was off with him tonight. He’d wake up tomorrow and be fine.

But then his cell phone was ringing, and when he answered it reluctantly, he heard Tony’s voice on the other line. “Hey, Gob, sorry…I know it’s late.”

“It’s okay,” he said, and it was, but he really hoped that Tony couldn’t hear in his voice any evidence of what he had done. He wasn’t sure how that would work, but anything was possible. “What’s up?”

“Um…I don’t know. I just stayed in all day and I guess I wanted to talk to someone,” Tony said, sounding pretty sheepish.

“Oh. That’s okay. You can talk to me,” Gob got comfortable in bed, holding his phone up to his ear gently. “I’ll try not to fall asleep on you.”

“Am I that boring?” Tony laughed.

“Nah, you’re nowhere near as boring as my brother.”

“Thank God. Then I’d have to change my stage last name,” Tony said. “Tell me about your day?”

As they talked about nothing really special, Gob thought that it was kind of like pillow talk—if the girls he slept with ever had anything interesting to say. He managed to groggily sign off when they had talked each other to sleep. “Tony, gotta…go sleep now,” he mumbled.

“Okay Gob,” Tony said, sounding just as tired. “Sleep a long time for me. You never…sleep enough.”

"Mmhmmph…night…you’re the best…love you,” Gob said. He heard Tony chuckle, but he was too tired to realize what was funny.

“You too, Gob. Night.”  

As soon as he heard the click of the phone, Gob was asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading, again i hope you all liked it, comments are much appreciated xoxoxoxo


	8. January 11, 2001

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey y'all! sorry, i have to be somewhere so this note won't be too long. this chapter has smut at the end, so be aware! apologies for any typos or errors, and apologies for the sap! love y'all

“It’s been a long time since I’ve done a red-eye flight,” Tony said.

“You think they’ll give us movies?” Gob asked.

He laughed. “I hope so. You ever been to Europe before?”

“Italy, last year, for the Challenger series. It was alright. I thought I’d pick up an Italian chick, but I just ran into a guy who was painting portraits and wanted to paint one of me…and my feet, for some reason,” he shrugged.

Tony stared at him in that incredulous look that Gob was familiar with by now. “The weirdest fucking things happen to you, man.”

“I just figured Europeans were freaky. What about you? Did you ever have like, a European love affair with some super handsome male model?” Gob asked. Tony had been so quiet about his love life, and Gob often found himself wondering what Tony would be like as a boyfriend. Not _Gob’s_ boyfriend—of course. But a boyfriend in general. To his credit, Gob figured Tony would be a pretty good boyfriend; he was caring, funny, and talented.

Tony shook his head. “I’m not that exciting.”

“Maybe this time, right?”

He smirked. “Yeah. Maybe I’ll have a Paris love affair this time.”

They boarded the plane, which was much bigger than the usual domestic planes they rode on. When they were seated, Gob went searching in his carry-on bag for pills, and realized he had forgotten them. “Fuck,” he hissed.

“Hm?”

“Oh, I forgot my…sleeping pills,” Gob said. They weren’t sleeping pills, really, but he didn’t know if he was ready to explain his pill habit (though he had mostly kicked it) to Tony. “I don’t really like long flights.”

“I understand. Why don’t you ask for tea when they come around with beverages?”

He gagged. “Ew. Tea.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Or some wine.”

“Oh, great idea!” Gob pulled out his Walkman (which he had loaded with a Billy Joel CD at the moment) and put his headphones on, trying to distract himself from the fact that they would be over the ocean, in the air, for likely 9 hours. He couldn’t sleep, not yet, but he found himself thinking. Him and Tony hadn’t talked about the phone conversation they had had the week prior. There wasn’t really a need to, it was just a phone call between friends who hadn’t seen each other in a while. Gob couldn’t even really remember a lot of what they talked about, he had been so tired. He thought hard in an attempt to remember; they had talked about songs they liked that had come out recently, Gob asked Tony if he had ever seen _Dynasty_ (he hadn’t, and Gob added it to the list of things he needed to show Tony, as cheesy as it was), and they talked about skating, of course. But past those frivolous conversations, Gob’s memory was foggy, because that was when he had started to fall asleep. He was pretty sure he mumbled that he was tired, but he couldn’t remember saying goodbye.

He took off his headphones. “Hey, Tony, when we talked on the phone last week, did I fall asleep on you? On the phone? Because my bill is gonna be fucking huge if I did.”

Tony smiled and shook his head. “No, you uh…you said you needed to sleep and I said goodbye and you said ‘love you’ and hung up.”

Gob’s throat went dry. “I…don’t know why I said that. I was really tired. Sorry, uh—”

“It’s alright, Gob. I know you didn’t mean anything by it,” Tony’s voice became quieter on the last sentence, and he looked away. “You don’t have to worry about your phone bill.”

He put his headphones back on and leaned against the window. They were about to take off, and Gob’s stomach was in knots, but he wasn’t sure if it was because of the plane-anxiety. As sleepy as he was that night, he felt like he did mean something by it. He knew he felt something for Tony. He wished he knew what it was, because it was causing a lot of anxiety around a topic he hadn’t really confronted before. For all his life liking girls was normal, it was the default, and he hadn’t ever considered anything else. He liked the random, sloppy makeouts he used to have with guys back in the day—in the moment. But he chose not to dwell on them, because he knew he would end up feeling weird and slightly dirty. He hadn’t thought too much about his shower masturbation session for the same reason.

His own family hated him enough. They hated that he did magic, so he stopped to focus on skating, but they still hated him when he skated. They hated him when he tried to work for the family business when he was in high school, so he stopped working, but they hated that he _didn’t_ work. If there was any possibility of anything else being strange or unnormal (by their standards) about him, he wasn’t sure they would tolerate him anymore. Any more than they already did, at least.

When the flight attendants came around with beverages, Tony tapped Gob, who pulled himself away from his Walkman and ordered some red wine. “You alright?” Tony asked once the attendant had left. “You look pretty melancholy?”

“I look like a melon?”

“No, I mean you look a little down.”

“I’m just thinking.”

Tony nodded. “Mm, I guess I’m just used to talkative Gob.”

“What, you’re not happy I’ve shut up for once?” Gob said, smiling so he didn’t sound accusatory.

“No, not really. I like listening to you talk.”

He had expected Tony to make a joke back, but Gob was surprised (Tony was always doing that—surprising him). “O-oh. Well, thanks.”

Gob halfheartedly watched the movie they were showing on the plane, but he fell asleep about halfway through from the wine. As he was drifting, though, he felt an already-asleep Tony shift around in his seat, eventually leaning his head on Gob’s shoulder. It felt comfortable, warm, and right.

* * *

When they got to Paris, Gob was exhausted, but happy. It was kind of like New York; always moving, people walking quickly and speaking quickly (though he didn’t understand what they were saying), and lots of noise. They checked into their hotel; which was so much smaller than American hotels, and the beds were tiny twin ones pushed up right next to each other. Despite how small the bed was, Gob flopped down onto it and sighed.

“Tired?” Tony asked, and when Gob nodded, he said, “Me too. Honestly, I’m surprised you fit on that bed, I thought your legs would hang off.”

Gob smirked. “Yeah, short guys don’t really have that problem, huh.”

“I’m not even short, dumbass,” Tony replied, but his voice was playful, so Gob didn’t feel like he was mad at him. “I’m average height.”

“5 foot 5 is average height?”

“I’m _5 foot 7!”_ Tony laughed and threw a pillow at him.

“Alright, alright! Whatever you say!” Gob said, throwing the pillow back, mumbling “shorty” under his breath.

Tony heard and said, “I swear to God, I was gonna offer to buy you dinner, but now you have to pay for your own.”

Gob snorted. “Whatever, I guess. I’m barely hungry.”

“We should eat _something_ , it is 5, even though it doesn’t feel like it. Want me to order room service?”

“I thought you weren’t paying.”

“Yeah, well…I’ll give you a pass this time. Another short comment, though, and I’ll kick your ass out.”

Gob smirked. “Alright, I’ll be cool, I guess. I don’t care what you get, as long as it’s not frog legs or snails or horse meat.”

“I think I’ll be able to find something.” Tony looked through the menu for a few moments before picking up the phone and dialing room service. “Um…yeah, _bon soir_ , um… _s’il vous plait,_ can I have the…grilled chicken with rice? Yes—I mean, _oui_.”

Gob tuned out Tony stumbling over their orders and thought about the competition that would begin tomorrow. He wouldn’t be surprised if Tony would take first, he had seen him training a few times since Skate America and he had improved (from his already stellar performances in October). If this was his last season, he was going to go out with a bang. Gob had been working on his West Side Story program, and he was feeling a lot better about it; he had a hard time connecting with it the way he did with the Queen program, though. He still couldn’t picture himself in that scene, holding on to someone he loved like his life depended on it. Maybe that was just how life was going to be for him. It’s not like anyone in his family had ever had that kind of love—except maybe Michael. Stupid, perfect Michael.

There was a knock on the door, and Tony opened it for a young, handsome, curly-haired French man. He had a rolling cart with their meals and a bottle of champagne. “Thank you, sir,” Tony said, then hesitated. “Uh, I mean, _merci_.”

The hotel employee laughed. “I speak English. Can I get anything else for you?”

“No, thank you,” Tony said, offering to help set up the tiny table, but the employee shook his head and set it up himself, putting their plates on it and pouring two glasses of champagne. Gob had just planned to eat his dinner in bed, but the table and everything made him feel fancy. They thanked the hotel employee one more time and sat down at the table, digging in as they realized they were hungrier than they thought. “So this is French food, huh,” Tony said with his mouth full.

“It’s really good,” Gob said. “I feel all sophisticated.”

“You’re rich, I figured you would eat stuff like this all the time.”

He rolled his eyes. “We had some nice meals, but it was different than this.”

“It’s good, though. I’m glad we get to room together, I would feel really lonely eating room service by myself,” Tony smiled, taking a sip of his champagne and making a pleased sound. “Oh my God, Gob, you have to try this.”

Gob took a sip and had to agree. “That’s really good.” He clinked his glass against Tony, just to seem more ‘sophisticated’, and said “You know, I’m glad we got to room together, too.” They smiled at each other.

* * *

After a long, and much needed sleep, they were at the first day of the Trophée Lalique. The short program was to start any minute now, and both Gob and Tony were in the second group due to their high scores in the last competition they had participated in. “Nervous?” Tony asked Gob.

“A little. Not as much as last time.”

“Good for you. You’ll be great.”

“So will you.”

Tony smiled. “You’re too nice to me, man.”

“I could really say the same for you.”

“Yeah, well, I like you. In case you weren’t sure.”

Gob looked away, feeling warm in the cheeks. “I…I was pretty sure, but it’s good to know. I like you too.”

They watched the first group’s short programs, all of them doing fairly well. The second group would most likely take over the top spots once it was their time; that was how this worked, except in the case of a really good skater going first. When it was time for the second group to do their warm-up, Gob was feeling less nervous than usual. Maybe this time, he’d get it right.

Gob went on second to last, just like he had during Skate America. When the music started, he tried, one last time, to picture himself in the scene, in someone’s arms. He tried to believe the lyrics—that there was a place for him, somewhere.

And as he started gliding across the ice, he suddenly got it.

It was Tony. Of course. It had always been Tony. He had sort of known during Hanukkah that there was something there, but now, he overcame the fear of really loving him and let himself realize. He let himself think of Tony in that way, as not just an attractive man, but as someone he wanted to hold, someone he wanted to find a place together with. It was still a bit scary to confront, but it was present now. It was real, and it showed in the way he skated the program. It wasn’t as stiff and technical; instead, each element flowed into one another. When he hit the final pose, there were tears in his eyes, and he looked around him to see the fellow Team USA members standing up and clapping for him, Tony included. He was smiling in a way that made Gob wonder if he understood. Then he realized everyone, all the spectators were clapping for him too. And standing. And throwing roses. A standing ovation. _Wow_ was the only word that echoed through his mind.

As he skated off to meet Aleks, who said “Wonderful!” a few times and smiled the biggest smile Gob had seen from him. Tony hugged him so tight Gob nearly lost some air.

"Wow, Gob, just…wow.” He said. Gob could barely say thank you without tears coming back to his eyes. He was going to have to tell Tony, if Tony hadn’t been able to tell by the way he was looking at him now.

Gob was in first after his program, but he was sure he’d be usurped by Tony, though he didn’t really care. He watched Tony’s short program intently. It was more high energy than Gob’s, and it had some impressive combinations. But, when Tony got to the kiss and cry, he was only in second. His smile was big and bright and genuine, though. Gob wasn’t sure he had seen him so happy at a competition before.

* * *

They didn’t talk much after the competition for that day had ended because they had interviews and talks with their coaches. But when they got to their hotel after dinner (where they had sat apart, by coincidence), Tony looked at Gob and said “that was the best I’ve ever seen you skate. I’ve been dying to tell you all day.”

Gob smiled, sitting down on the bed. “Thanks. You did great, too.”

“You don’t have to be polite,” Tony laughed, taking the spot next to him on the bed. “I didn’t suck, but I was nowhere near your level of emotion and passion.”

“I don’t know where it came from,” Gob lied, “I guess I was just feeling…”

“Romantic?”

“Yeah, romantic.”

Tony put his hand on Gob’s knee, and Gob felt his breath catch in his throat. “Well, at first I didn’t really think of you as a romantic person, but I guess you proved me wrong.”

“I have lots of secrets,” Gob said, “I’m still a magician in that way, I guess.”

Tony’s eyes flicked down to Gob’s lips, and Gob almost pulled away, it was just nearly too much. But he didn’t. “What other secrets do you have?” Tony asked, voice low.

Gob couldn’t think of a witty retort. Instead, he just surged forward and put his lips on Tony’s. Tony kissed back instantly; there was no shock, no moment of panic. One of his hands stayed on Gob’s knee, and the other gripped at his shirt. They didn’t start off slow, opting instead for hot, open-mouthed kisses. Gob’s tongue was in Tony’s mouth within seconds, and he was making borderline obscene noises that were thankfully muffled. If he hadn’t have wanted this for so long, he would’ve worried that he was coming on too strong.

Tony didn’t seem to think so, because his hand was starting to move up Gob’s leg, then back to his knee, rubbing his thigh leisurely. Gob’s pants were getting tighter every time he did it, and he felt a bit like a teenage boy who could get it up ridiculously easy. He threaded a hand into Tony’s gelled-up hair, and Tony made a noise of surprise, but he didn’t oppose it. As if in retaliation, he started fumbling with a button on Gob’s shirt, and Gob pulled away, out of breath. “You can, you know,” he said.

“Hm?” Tony asked.

“Take it off.”

“You sure?”

“Sure. It’s nothing you haven’t seen before, right?”

“Good point,” Tony said, and started working on unbuttoning him, pressing soft kisses to his neck while he did. It gave Gob chills all over his body, especially when he found a certain spot and started sucking. He let out a little whine, shrugging off his shirt once it was unbuttoned. Tony gave his shoulders a push, forcing him to lie down on the bed. He straddled him, which, if Gob was a bit younger, might have made him orgasm right then and there. Something about being taken over like this was so hot to him. Tony kissed down his neck to his collarbone, one hand resting on his chest while his other tried fruitlessly to unbutton his own shirt.

“Let me help,” Gob offered, unbuttoning his shirt even quicker than Tony did his. “God, you’re _hot_ ,” he said, trailing a hand down his chest and to his toned stomach. Tony didn’t reply, kissing him in place of one. He bit down on Gob’s lower lip this time, tugging on it softly as he pulled away and kept kissing down his neck and chest.

Gob’s hands went to grasp at Tony’s hair again, or grab his shoulders, or touch him in some way, but Tony took his wrists and pinned him to the bed. Gob gasped sharply, and Tony let go, a sheepish expression on his face. “Sorry, I got…carried away.”

“No, no,” Gob said breathlessly. “Pin me down. Please.”

Tony raised an eyebrow. “Oh? That’s something you like?”

He nodded. He hadn’t _realized_ how much he liked it until now, but something about Tony’s small body on top of him, overpowering him, made him so hot under the collar (or, presently, his lack of collar) he was already straining against his pants. Tony smirked and kept his hands pinned to the bed, mumbling “no touching until you’ve been a good boy” and peppering little kisses all over his chest. He ran his tongue lightly along Gob’s nipple, watching his face to see how he would react. He seemed to get the desired reaction, because when Gob squirmed and whimpered, Tony took his nipple in his mouth and sucked lightly.  No one had ever done that to him before, and every flick of Tony’s tongue went straight to Gob’s crotch. He gave the same attention to his other nipple, a hand wandering down to undo his belt. “Someone’s eager, hm?” he asked.

Gob nodded. “I-I really want you to touch me.”

“I’m getting there,” Tony promised, giving his lips a quick peck. “You know, I think I have an idea. Stay here.” He got up, leaving Gob splayed out on the bed, red-faced and whimpering softly. Tony dug through his suitcase for a moment, coming back with a silk tie. “Are you okay with this?” he asked.

Gob nodded speechlessly. He suddenly felt very vanilla for someone who had had a lot of sex. Tony took his wrists gently, kissing them tenderly for a few moments and adding “you can ask me to stop any time, okay?” before tying his wrists to the wooden headboard. He didn’t tie them too tight, giving Gob enough room to move his hands a little, but he wouldn’t be able to let his hands wander now. Tony unbuttoned Gob’s pants and slid them down his long legs, unashamedly staring at how Gob’s cock was nearly popping out of his briefs. “Can I take these off?” he asked, and Gob nodded early, moaning at the fabric brushing against his hard-on as Tony stripped him down until he was completely naked.

“What an eager little slut,” Tony mumbled, running a hand up his inner thigh to touch his cock lightly. He wrapped his hand around him, not wanting to torture Gob _too_ much. “It’s so sexy how bad you want this. If I had lube, I’d fuck you so hard you’d forget your name.”

“Wh-who’s to say I haven’t already forgotten it,” Gob joked.

“Good,” he said. “You’d look so sexy on your stomach, face pressed against the pillow…like the whore you are.”

“ _Yes_ ,” Gob moaned, louder than before. “I’m your whore.”

Tony started stroking him, slow and gentle at first. “You’ve been so good, so obedient…are you always like this in bed? So easy to toy with?”

Gob couldn’t speak; every stroke felt like electricity going up his spine. He stilled his hand after a few moments, deciding to lower his head and kiss Gob’s thighs, nuzzling them and making him laugh. Tony looked up at him intently, experimentally flicking his tongue over the head of Gob’s cock. Gob nearly bucked his hips up in Tony’s face, crying out “Oh my _God_ , Tony.”

Tony smirked, wrapping his mouth around the head and sucking lightly, taking a little bit more of him every few seconds. The more Gob felt his hot, wet mouth around him, the more he moaned and gasped and swore. He was probably being way too loud, but he couldn’t bother to care; he felt so completely helpless underneath Tony, and it was possibly the sexiest thing that had ever happened to him. “Tony, I’m not gonna…last long,” he warned him.

Tony nodded quickly, as if to tell him he was okay. His hands slid under to grip at Gob’s ass, squeezing and digging his fingernails into the skin. Gob arched his back, causing Tony to take all of him in his mouth, and he moaned around his cock, which made almost made Gob squeal. One finger carefully circled the rim of Gob’s asshole, and his eyes clenched shut at how sensitive it was. “You’re so…fucking dirty,” he moaned, and Tony seemed to take that as approval, because he slowly started teasing his way in as he sucked him. Gob was so close he felt like he could burst, and when Tony got his index finger all the way in, he curled it _just right_. “Tony Tony Tony,” he said, “Tony, I’m gonna—I’m so—”

Tony moaned softly, curling his finger again, and Gob felt something break inside him and he saw fireworks behind his eyes. He pulled at his restraints and his hips rocked up into Tony’s mouth until he was satiated. Tony pulled away with a _pop_ , easing his finger out as well. He made sure Gob was looking in his eyes as he swallowed his cum, which, despite him being soft, made Gob’s cock twitch. “You came so good for me,” Tony said, kissing his lips. Gob could taste his own salty cum on the other man’s lips, and it was sexy in an unexpected way. “I’ll untie you,” he said, undoing the tie with a gentleness that he hadn’t been showing a few minutes ago. He kissed Gob’s wrists tenderly. “Did you enjoy that, Gob?”

“Oh my God, so much,” Gob said. “I’ve never done anything like that before. I guess it was pretty obvious, though.”

Tony smiled. “You were very good. Sorry for going all dominant on you, I have no idea where that came from.”

“I could tell _you’ve_ done this before,” Gob joked with a wink that wasn’t really sexy, but he tried.

“Oh, yeah, I’ve _topped_ , but…I dunno, something about you was begging to be tied up and put in your place.”

He bit his lip. “I’d let you. Anytime.” His eyes trailed down to see Tony’s hard-on pressing against his jeans. “But I should take care of you now, yeah? Do you want me to…suck you off?”

“Mm…I kinda wanna look in your eyes when I cum. Lay next to me and just…touch me,” he requested. Gob made quick work of undoing his pants and pulling them down, along with his boxers. Tony kissed him when he noticed how his hands shook. “I know you’ll make me feel good,” he promised, and it reassured Gob a little. He took Tony’s cock in his hand just like Tony had done to him, starting with slow strokes. Tony shivered. “Fuck, just like that, babe.”

Gob blushed at being called ‘babe’, but he didn’t oppose it—not at all. He touched Tony like he would touch himself, starting slow but going faster as Tony started rolling his hips up. He praised Gob under his breath, kissing his face and neck and everywhere he could reach. “So good,” he mumbled, “You treat me so good.”

When Gob’s fingers brushed against Tony’s balls, one hand coming up to cup them, Tony tensed. “That’s it—fuck!” he buried his head in Gob’s shoulder, yelping out a moan as he came in his hand, shuddering against him. He stayed pressed up against him for a few moments, regaining his breath, while Gob brought his hand to his mouth and licked up the mess Tony had made. “Wow, I think you’re the dirty one.”

Gob smirked. “Mm, what was I gonna do? Just go wash my hands? I had to see how you tasted, too.”

“You’re fucking incredible,” Tony said, giving him a kiss and laying down fully, settling in beside Gob. Just like on the plane, it felt right. “I’m exhausted. It’s been awhile for me…if you couldn’t tell by how fast I came.”

Gob chuckled. “It has for me, too. Wanna take a nap?”

“Yeah. Stay with me?”

“I will. I’m sleepy too,” he said, kissing him one last time. He was quickly drifting off, and if he were more alert, he would worry about what the state of their relationship was after all this. But, he was so content in his post-orgasm glow, he figured they would talk about it when they woke up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading xooxoxooxox


	9. January 13, 2001

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi y'all! i can't believe 5b is finally out and AD is (presumably) over! it's so weird to think about how it's lasted 16 years, give and take some hiatuses :P i hope you all enjoyed it, i really did! especially the finale, omg, it was perfect! if you'd like to discuss it come find me on tumblr, @gobbluthlesbian
> 
> anyway,, i'm not sure if i love this chapter especially after the explosive last one, but i hope that it's alright and you all enjoy it as well. this fic will likely wrap up in the next couple chapters, however, i have other AD fics planned, especially after 5b, so i really hope that you all still want to keep reading stuff from me! thank you for all the support!

Gob’s eyes fluttered open, woken up by the sun streaming in the window. He felt well-rested, for once, and he thought about getting up to get some breakfast when he felt someone nuzzle against his shoulder. He looked to his side to see Tony, in the same position he had fallen asleep in last night. Gob smiled tiredly and kissed his forehead. He had never woken up someone he had slept with like that before; usually he just got out of there, scared of what the girls would say when they woke up. Then again, this was the first time he had slept with someone who wasn’t a girl. Tony’s moaned softly and opened his eyes, looking at the clock. “Oh, we slept all night,” he chuckled. “I thought we would just take a long nap.”

“We were really tired,” Gob said. “Did you sleep okay?”

“Better than okay. I’m, uh…glad you stayed,” Tony said, looking away. “It was…comfortable.”

Gob felt suddenly shy as well. He realized that him and Tony had basically cuddled as they slept; he hadn’t cuddled with anyone since he was probably a baby, if his parents even cuddled him then (it was unlikely). Girls rarely wanted to be held by him, and again, he didn’t usually stay the night. What was weirder was how comforting being close to Tony was for him. Is this what love felt like? It was weird. A good weird, but weird. “Yeah, it was,” Gob said. “Do we have to get up just yet?”

Tony shook his head. “No, it’s actually pretty early. Why, you wanna stay in bed a little longer?”

Gob nodded, pulling Tony in. “Can we? You can say no.”

Tony pecked his lips. “I say yes.”

“God, you’re the best,” Gob said. He thought about asking what this meant for them; what it made them, relationship-wise. It was still intimidating, though, and he didn’t know how Tony would react. Maybe Tony was just having fun, he wouldn’t be surprised if he was, and he wouldn’t be mad. People had fun with Gob all the time, and then discarded him and chose someone else. It was normal for him.

But, when he thought of the season ending, and his…thing with Tony ending, too, he felt an overwhelming sadness. He had never had friends on the team, due to his own competitiveness. The last time he had close friends was when he was with the Hot Cops, and they still talked every now and then, but Gob no longer needed to strip to pay for lessons, so he didn’t see them as often. He didn’t want to move away from Tony once Tony was done with skating. The thought of being lonely again was too much to bear.

“Hey, Gob,” Tony said softly. “You look sad. What’s up?”

“Oh,” he snapped out of it, “Sorry, just thinking.”

“Okay, I was just worried because you got all quiet and looked like some sad song was playing in your head. Like that ‘hello darkness, my old friend’ song, or something.”

Gob loved that song, but he couldn’t listen to it too often, it made him feel weird and…what was that word? Melancholy. “Oh, no,” he shrugged it off, “Just still tired, I guess.”

“Maybe a shower will wake you up?” There was a glint in Tony’s eyes when he asked.

“That depends. Will you join me?”

“The shower is pretty small, but we might as well try.”

“What are we waiting for, then?” Gob smirked, and threw off the covers, still nude, to get to the shower.

The mirror in the bathroom was completely fogged up with steam when they left the shower. They had spent quite awhile in there, what with Tony pinning Gob up against the wall while the water streamed down on him. He had jerked Gob off so slowly it was almost torture, and only sped up when Gob begged and whined and whimpered like, in Tony’s words “a whore”. As a way of thanking him, Gob had gotten on his knees and given Tony a blowjob, and Tony was in awe of how good at it he was—there was no way he hadn’t done it before. But they didn’t broach the topic. Instead Tony focused on how Gob looked, looking up at him, droplets of water running down his face, sticking to his eyelashes, and his big, pleading eyes. He obviously wanted to please Tony so much, and that was so sexy to Tony that he came hard and fast, gripping at Gob’s hair so hard it made Gob tilt his head back and moan in a mix of pain and pleasure.

Gob walked out of the steamy bathroom in a tiny robe, knowing Tony was behind him and knowing _exactly_ where his eyes were. “Are you ready for the long?” Gob asked, turning around and stopping Tony in his tracks.

“Y-yeah,” Tony stammered. “I just need to nail that axel, you know. Then I might surpass you,” he winked. His long program was musical theatre-themed, like Gob’s short, but was a medley of songs from _Cabaret_. They had talked about it early on in their friendship—Tony was delighted to hear Gob knew it and had always loved the “Mein Herr” number.

“Don’t count your ducks before they eat their bread.”

“…What?”

“You know that saying? Like, don’t get your hopes up?”

Tony laughed. “It’s ‘don’t count your chickens before they hatch’.”

“What? That’s so weird.”

“A lot less weird than whatever you said. It’s a good thing you’re cute sometimes, you know.”

Gob blushed, pausing with his shirt over his head. “It’s a good thing you’re the only person allowed to call me cute.”

* * *

Tony landed the axel pretty well, but Gob stayed in first after the long program. The interviewers swarmed him, a lot of them speaking with heavy French accents. “Gob,” one pretty French woman asked him, thrusting a microphone in his face. “Are you surprised you won after being in second for most of your career?”

“Yeah…I’m always surprised, I guess,” he said, which seemed like a tactful answer, “I’ve worked really hard, though, so I’m glad it paid off.”

“And your rival, Tony Wonder,” she continued, pronouncing his name like _Toh-nee Wond-ehrr_ , “What do you think he will feel like, now being put in second for once?”

Gob chuckled. “Um…Tony is very talented, everyone knows that. I love everything he does. We’re…friends,” that was true—but it was definitely more than a friendship at that point, “I hope he’s happy, that’s all.”

“I would expect you to be more competitive,” she said, “You seem so fierce on the ice!”

Gob shrugged. “I just try to be better every time I skate.”

Tony met up with him after the interviews, giving him a big hug. “Wow, you blew everyone else out of the water, man.”

“You’re not mad?” Honestly, Gob had been wondering if Tony would be upset that someone knocked him off the 1st place spot, especially since they had become so close. He found it weird that he was worried about this sort of thing, because the interviewer was right—he was very competitive, and last year he would’ve killed to be first place all the time.

Tony shook his head. “No, you can’t win them all. You deserve this. You worked really hard, and I’m fine with second place every now and then. Ask me at the Grand Prix final, though.”

“Fuck, that’s next week,” Gob said under his breath.

“I know, right? Anyway, I was thinking we could go out to a restaurant tonight, eat some real French food?”

He smiled. “I like that. And when we get back to our hotel?”

Tony bit his lip, his eyes darting downward. “We’ll see what happens.”

Gob’s already tight costume felt a lot tighter. He couldn’t wait; for once, he wanted to skip the medal ceremony.

* * *

After a few more nights in Paris, mostly spent in their hotel room with their hands all over each other, Gob and Tony returned to the US. Gob thought more and more each day what his and Tony’s relationship really was at this point, but he didn’t ask, mostly out of fear of being disappointed. Of course he wanted Tony to feel the sa,e way for him and not just want sex. But he also wouldn’t blame Tony if he just wanted sex; Tony probably still assumed he was straight, or bi-curious, or whatever. Hell, maybe it was just a Paris thing. It was the city of love after all. They hadn’t talked about it seriously.

However, after a few days in the US, Gob was starting to worry. He hadn’t seen Tony since they left the airport separately (with just a friendly goodbye—they didn’t kiss in public, of course). He called Tony a few times, but their schedules never really lined up. He chalked it up to Tony practicing for the Grand Prix Final, just as Gob was, but the more he sat in his own thoughts, the more he got worried. Even Sally noticed it when they practiced together; she said he looked like he was thinking so hard he was gonna give himself wrinkles.

Gob was having a smoke break after his practice on Tuesday. He was pacing back and forth as he puffed on his cigarette, willing himself to pick up his phone and call Tony and _talk_ about this. He wanted Tony so badly, not just in bed, and he was going to have to be honest about it instead of pushing it down. He didn’t know if he was gay or whatever, and the idea of calling Tony his boyfriend still made him scared, but not scared enough to not want it. Maybe Tony was just _that good_ at sucking dick. He threw his cigarette on the ground and stomped it out, picking up his phone as he did. He dialed Tony, and he picked it up after a few rings. “Hello.” He sounded so tired.

“H-hi, it’s Gob. I…wanted to talk to you about something.”

“That’s funny, I want to talk to _you_ about something,” Tony said.

“Oh,” his stomach sank. He was pretty sure Tony would say they had to stop sleeping together, that Tony wanted something more than fooling around with a seemingly straight guy. “Um…you go first.”

Tony sighed deeply, hesitating. “I’m…in the hospital.”

The worst things possible went through Gob’s mind. He was clean, wasn’t he? He hadn’t given Tony anything, there was no way. Did he have cancer? Was he dying? Did someone in his family die? What the hell was going on? “Oh my God, Tony, I-I’m…w-w-wha…wh-what’s….” his words were heavy in his mouth, and he couldn’t get them out.

“It’s okay, Gob, it’s really okay. I broke my leg.”

“You _what?!_ ”

He sighed again. “I know. Pretty perfect timing, huh? I had a nasty fall on the ice as soon as I got back to skating on Monday. They had to take me in an ambulance. I didn’t know if I was gonna tell you, because I didn’t know how bad it was, but it looks like no Grand Prix Final for me.”

“God, Tony.”

“I know, I know. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you right away.”

“Can I come visit you? Right now? Please? I want to see you…so bad, Tony, you have no idea, there’s so much on my mind, and I…I can’t just keep it to myself anymore, please, I—”

“Shh, shh,” Tony said soothingly. “I’d love for you to come,” and the softness in his voice made Gob’s whole body sag in relief. So Tony wasn’t sick of him after all. He wanted to see him. “You can come now, but no rush, okay? I understand, you need to practice.”

“I’m done with practice. I’m coming.”

Tony chuckled. “Okay. I’ll see you.”

They hung up, and Gob rushed to his car. He had to talk to Tony about all his feelings now, or he wasn’t sure if he ever would.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the cliche ending but i hope you enjoyed! thank you for reading xoxoxoxo


	10. January 18 2001

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi! this chapter is pretty sappy and fluffy, but i needed some blunder fluff. the next chapter will be the last. i worked really hard on this fic, and i really hope that you all have enjoyed reading it. thank you for all your nice comments throughout this whole thing.

Gob got to the hospital as fast as he could; of course, the traffic set him back. The sun was starting to set by the time he got there, and he worried if they would let him in. When he told the lady at the front desk who he was there to see, she asked “And who is he to you?”. Which was like, the worst question to ask at that time, after all that thinking he had just been doing. Gob settled on saying he was Tony’s good friend, and soon he was being directed to his hospital room, where Tony lay in a bed with his leg in a cast, elevated on a pillow.

“Hi,” he said tiredly. Gob grinned, wanting nothing more than to run to his friend (with benefits, or whatever) and give him a hug, but that was impossible. So he dragged a chair up to Tony’s bedside and sat down.

“Hi. You’re a sight for sore eyes,” it was a line Gob had used when he was flirting with girls in bars, but he never really meant it; it was just something you said that sounded vaguely sweet. This time, though, he meant it. He felt a little pathetic, aching to see Tony after just a few days. It felt like how those schoolboy crushes were always described, the way you completely light up and feel warm and happy when you’re with a certain person.

Tony chuckled. “You’re cute. I haven’t looked in a mirror, but I can’t imagine how bad my hair looks. I’ve been sleeping most of the day, thanks to the pain meds.”

“Did it hurt?” Gob asked, gesturing to Tony’s bound leg. He nodded sagely in response.

“Like an absolute bitch. I broke my wrist when I was a kid, but I don’t remember it hurting as much as this. I have to stay off this leg for about two months,” he said. Gob’s eyes widened.

“Holy shit. So…the Grand Prix Final is out of the question.”

Tony chuckled mirthlessly. “Yeah. So are US Champs.”

“What about Worlds?”

“It’s not likely. Not at all.”

Gob’s face fell. “But…”

“I know. It’s a pretty sad way to end my skating career.”

“What? You’re seriously…retiring after this?”

Tony stared up at the ceiling. “I mean, this is a pretty big setback.”

“Lots of skaters have injuries. So you had the end the season early, whatever, it happens. But what about next year?”

“You know how long I’ve been at this. Almost ten years. I’m not saying one way or another just yet, but I’m leaning more towards retirement than not retiring. Anyway, why does it bother you? You’re an up-and-coming guy, and I think you’ll really get your time in the spotlight at US Champs and Worlds. Next year could be even better for you.”

“Why are you so lax about retiring? I thought this was your passion?” Gob asked, not completely sure why there was a hint of anger in his voice. After all, he _should’ve_ been happy. If it was anyone else, any of his other competitors, he probably would’ve taken a small pleasure in a forced early retirement. If it was anyone else, but Tony was different. He was always different.

“Gob, it is. But it’s okay. I had my time, just like everyone else had their time. Dick Button eventually had to retire. Brian Orser retired. Michelle Kwan, I’m sure, will eventually retire, and she’s on top of the world right now. It’s just life in figure skating. I still don’t get why it matters to you so much, for some reason I thought you’d be—I dunno, happy about it all?”

“I’m not happy because,” Gob paused and inhaled slowly, finding his breath to shaky all of a sudden. “Because I’m really gonna miss you. And what if—what if you forget about me when you move on? You’re gonna move on from skating, and me, too. A-and I really don’t want that. I want to stay with you, and I don’t really get why or how or if I’m gay or whatever, but all I know is I want to be around you all the time, Tony. Because you don’t treat me like a total joke.” Tears were flowing down Gob’s cheeks at that point, both out of embarrassment from admitting all that and just the raw honesty of it all. He put his head in his arms on the bed and sighed deeply, trying and failing to compose himself.

Tony was silent for a few long seconds, which only made him more scared. “Gobie,” Tony said, his voice soft in the way it got sometimes when they were together. “You know I wouldn’t just forget about you like that. You know, when I started skating, I didn’t have that many friends. I know it sounds embarrassing, but you’re the first real friend I’ve had in California. Even if you don’t want to…I dunno, be romantic or sexual with guys anymore, I’m happy to be your friend. Even when I leave skating. So don’t worry. Please. Because you’re gonna make _me_ cry, and I really don’t want to.”

“The thing with us sleeping together, I—”

“If you still need to think about it, I get it. I mean…I’m not gonna say I never felt anything for you, because that wouldn’t be true, but I know to be careful when it comes to straight guys. You can mess around with them, but don’t get too attached to them romantically.” Tony shrugged, and it was clear this was something he had experienced before.

“That’s the thing though. I like fucking you. I mean, I really, _really_ like fucking you,” he said, and Tony laughed.

“I’m flattered. I have to say I really like fucking you, too.”

“But I think I would like other stuff, too. Like, I dunno. Cheesy stuff. Holding…hands, and sleeping in the same…bed and all,” Gob listed these things off like they were completely foreign concepts to him. They kind of were, in a way. Most relationships he had with girls were going through the motions and were based completely around sex. He had never wanted to do these things with any of his past girlfriends.

Tony smiled. “You really think so?”

“I do. It’s really weird to say out loud.”

Tony took Gob’s hand. “Then I think we should risk it.”

“Yeah. We should.” Gob smiled. He was leaning in for a kiss when he heard the nurse’s footsteps and jerked back into his seat quickly.

“I didn’t realize you had a visitor,” she said to Tony.

“Yeah, it was kind of a surprise. This is my friend Gob. He’s a skater, too,” Tony was still holding his hand, and Gob pondered if he should pull it away, but he didn’t know how much longer he would be able to hold it, so he stayed in his place for now.

“That’s nice,” the nurse said. “But visiting hours will be over in a few minutes, so you should probably say goodbye. I’m just here to check your vitals before bed.”

Tony sighed. “Okay,” he let his hand slip from Gob’s.

“Do you have someone to pick you up tomorrow?” the nurse asked. “Your friend, maybe?”

“Oh, yeah. Can you come back tomorrow at 10, Gobie?”

Being called a nickname like that in front of a stranger made Gob turn pink. “Yeah, yeah, I can. I’ll set an alarm.”

“Thank you,” the nurse said, with a tight-lipped, polite smile that sent the message to Gob that he probably needed to leave now. Maybe if he had a little less self-control (he rarely had any to begin with), he would’ve leaned in and given Tony a big kiss right in front of the nurse. But he controlled himself and stood up.

“See you tomorrow, Tony.”

“See you. I’ll miss you.”

Gob walked out of the hospital, feeling kind of amazed. He still wasn’t sure if he was gay, or whatever that other word was…girl-and-guy-sexual, something like that. But he had never felt for _anyone_ the way he felt for Tony; girls didn’t spark that feeling in him like Tony did. Was he just Tony-sexual? But then he thought about other guys he had found attractive, like his friends in the Hot Cops. How he had kissed those guys when he was drunk enough, and how he had liked it, despite the dirty feeling he had the next morning. He didn’t feel dirty when he kissed Tony (well, sometimes he felt dirty, but in a _really good way_ ), but maybe that was because he didn’t see kissing boys as something dirty and wrong anymore? Gob had never thought this much about something in his life, and it was making his head hurt. 

* * *

 

He picked Tony up the next day at the hospital; a nurse wheeled him out in a wheelchair and helped load his crutches in Gob’s car. Gob had pulled the passenger seat all the way back so Tony would have room for his clunky cast. “Hi,” he smiled as the nurse helped him get in. Tony was grumbling; this was clearly a shot to his ego.

The nurse politely said goodbye to Tony and told him to look after himself so she wouldn’t see him again. Tony nodded and closed the door, leaning back into the seat and sighing. “Tired?” Gob asked.

Tony chuckled. “I guess. My life is gonna be a lot more frustrating for about two months. I can’t get this thing wet, so I have to put a goddamn chair in the shower.”

“Or I could give you a sponge bath,” Gob said, both as a joke and an attempt at flirting. Thankfully it made Tony smirk.

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

Gob shifted onto the highway. “I mean, any excuse to get you naked. You have seen your own body, haven’t you?”

“Yeah, but I feel like sponge baths are pretty un-sexy.”

“I can make anything sexy.”

“…You know, I don’t doubt that,” Tony said. “Cops aren’t really sexy, but didn’t you dress up as one when you stripped?”

“Yup. And I looked pretty fucking sexy doing it.”

“Trust me, I have no doubts,” Tony replied.

Thankfully, Tony’s apartment complex had an elevator, and Gob was by his side as he hobbled on his crutches to his door and opened it. “Thanks for taking me home,” he said.

“It’s no problem,” Gob said, wondering he would’ve done something like this for anyone else (probably not).

“You don’t have to stay. I’ll be okay.”

“Oh, you…don’t want me to?”

Tony looked at him and tilted his head, surprised. “I-I mean, I’d like you to, but you don’t have to, like, take care of me…”

He shrugged. “Well, if you need anything, I’ll be here, so I might as well stay. So you have that.”

“Yeah. That way I’ll have someone,” Tony nodded. “I’ve only got one bed, though—wait, I guess that’s not a problem. We’re-we’re something now, aren’t we?”

Gob nodded, cautiously. ‘Something’ was a good word for it.

“Sorry, all these pain meds have me kind of frazzled. I need to sit down.” He chuckled breathily.

“Do you need anything? Water?”

“No, it’s okay,” Tony put his foot on the coffee table. “Come sit down, though. We can watch a movie?”

“Yeah, sounds nice,” Gob said, sitting down and instinctively wrapping an arm around his…his ‘something’. His Tony. Tony leaned in for a kiss, which he returned.

“I’ve been waiting to do that since I saw you yesterday.”

“Yeah, that nurse was kind of a cockblock, huh?”

“This whole situation is a cockblock. How are we supposed to, y’know, do it, with my leg in this big-ass cast?”

Gob shrugged. “Well, there’s always hand stuff. And mouth stuff.”

“Yeah, I just look so…unsexy.”

“Trust me, I won’t be looking at your _leg_ when we’re doing that stuff,” Gob smirked and gave Tony a reassuring kiss.

“You’re the best.”

No one had ever told Gob in his life that he was the best. Usually it was that he was the worst—the worst Bluth brother, the worst student, the worst at magic. He kind of worried there would be a point in the future where Tony would call him the worst boyfriend. He decided for now, he had to hold onto this, because he didn’t know how long it would last. He kissed Tony’s cheek and tried to pay attention to the movie, but Tony was distracting him by leaving soft, lazy kisses wherever he could reach on Gob’s face.

It seemed like with each kiss, a worry of Gob’s dissolved. Tony asked him if he thought the guy in the movie was hot, and Gob laughed and said no. Tony made a quip that he’d figure out his type in guys when he was more confident in his sexuality. It was a day that Gob would’ve considered boring a few years ago, but somehow, Tony was incapable of making things boring.

* * *

The Grand Prix final came and went, as well as US Championships. Tony couldn’t come, but he watched them on TV, calling Gob after every skate. Gob received the gold in both events, and there was a lot of media buzz about him, as there always was when a new skater started taking over the scene. Tony sometimes was sad that he couldn’t be there competing himself, but he was happy to support Gob.

“I don’t know how you’re not jealous,” Gob said one time over the phone after the free skate in the US Championships.

Tony said, “I’m kind of surprised, too. I knew you were gonna be big competition this season, but I didn’t know I was gonna literally fall in love with you.”

That made Gob giddy, and he was secretly glad Tony wasn’t there to see him nearly giggling. “So you’re not mad?”

“Mostly mad at myself for breaking my leg, really. But I’m happy for you. If it were any other guy, though, I’d probably be pissed, trust me.”

“Good thing I’m so charming.”

When Gob came back from that championship, he didn’t go to his place, he went to Tony’s. He had essentially moved in with him after a few weeks; he had brought some of his clothes over and put them in Tony’s closet. Through their time together, Tony showed him how to make some basic meals, and Gob helped him with the whole shower situation—thankfully sponge baths weren’t necessary. They spent their nights in, not doing many “exciting” things, except in bed. Despite Tony’s lamentations, his cast didn’t make him any less sexy to Gob. They still hadn’t gone “all the way” yet, but they made good use of their hands and mouth. Tony’s mom called every couple of days (Gob’s mom hadn’t called in months, but that was normal) to check in. Tony complained, but Gob could tell he appreciated it.

“I can’t wait til I get out of this thing and I can take you on a proper date,” Tony said one day after Gob came back from practice. He had been practicing for longer hours, with the World Championships in a few weeks.

“How much longer?”

“Oh…maybe four or three weeks? Give or take. Could be longer.”

“Maybe you’ll be able to come to Worlds with me.”

Tony smiled. “I’d like that. But I also wanna take you to a restaurant, or to a movie. We could fool around in the back, like I never got to when I was a teenager. But then again, you scream like a pornstar, I don’t think we could get away with that.”

“What? I do _not_ scream like a pornstar.”

Tony gave him a smug look. “Then how come people have banged on our walls, yelling at us to shut up?”

“They’re just homophobic and can’t handle beautiful expressions of beautiful, gay love.” Gob had been saying both “gay” and “love” a lot more often lately, and they didn’t leave bad tastes in his mouth.

“Or they don’t wanna hear loud fucking all night?”

“Again, homophobia.”

“I just hope we don’t ever get a serious noise complaint. I might die.”

“I’ll _try_ to keep it down,” Gob said.

“Good. I can always get you a gag,” Tony winked, making him turn pink.

It seemed like they had skipped the awkward dating stage where they went to mediocre restaurants and made small talk. Instead, they had settled into somewhat of a routine, even with Tony’s broken leg. It was needless to say Gob had never gotten to this stage with anyone else, and before he never would’ve wanted to. But he was content to cuddle on the couch with Tony, rewatching _The Magic Show_ or _Cabaret_ or even reruns of _Dynasty_.

It was weird, how nice it was doing things that he used to think were boring. Maybe he was growing up. God forbid.

Or, he was just in love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if all the sap made you sick lol. thank you for reading xoxooxox


	11. March 15, 2001

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well, here it is, everyone. the last chapter of I Want to Break Free. it's so strange to write that, because i feel like i've been working on this project for a very long time! this is definitely the fic i've worked the hardest on and done the most research for (though there are some factual inaccuracies--sorry!!!). i worried a lot about it--worried that people wouldn't like it or it would be too cliche or boring. i have to admit the ending is a little cliche, but i hope you like it anyway :) i really am proud of this fic, figure skating is one of my biggest passions, and i've never written about it until now. thank you all for reading and i hope you enjoy the last chapter.

Gob was awoken by the buzz of his alarm, which he slapped off and burrowed back under the covers. “Mm…baby, time to wake up,” he heard Tony’s voice and felt a kiss on his shoulder.

“Noooo,” Gob groaned. The sun wasn’t even up yet, and the thought of getting up and getting dressed and functioning like a human being was absolutely repulsive at the moment.

“We have to be at the airport,” Tony said, kissing along his shoulder and up his neck. Gob wasn’t sure how this was supposed to be an incentive to him. He could stay in bed all day with Tony kissing him like that. He wasn’t going to complain, but he forced himself to pull away and sit up. “You excited?” Tony asked.

Gob half-sighed, half-yawned. He was excited for World Championships, and he was even more excited that Tony could come and watch. But he was nervous, too. He was on a winning streak, and he knew he was a contender for the podium. If he didn’t get on that podium, he knew he would let down a lot of people—his coach, Team USA, and probably Tony. It would provide more ammo to his mother, more reason for her to tear him down every time they spoke about skating. Another reason for her to think of it as a waste of time and money on her part. “Gobie?” Tony said, noticing Gob staring off tiredly.

“Oh, sorry. Yeah, I’m excited.”

Tony leaned in for a kiss on the lips. “I’ll make the coffee if you promise to get up and get dressed?”

“Okay,” he nodded, slowly sitting up and sighing. World Championships were in Canada, and the flight wasn’t too long, but he was dreading it. Partly from the anxiety the idea of not winning brought him, and partly because the skating season would be over after this. Even though the training period started only a few months after World’s, Gob never knew what to do in those empty months. Last year he had spent them hanging around his family’s house and going to bars with his old Hot Cop friends. He wondered if he would scare Tony off after awhile, after this nice little honeymoon stage ended.

He was good at that, after all—scaring people away.

Tony had been in the kitchen for at least ten minutes by the time Gob came out of the bedroom and joined him. “Here, I made you a nice, 4 AM cup of coffee,” Tony handed him a hot cup, standing on his toes to kiss his cheek. “That’ll warm you up.”

“Thanks, babe,” Gob said, taking a big gulp and burning his tongue, but not reacting. He did that all the time. “Why are you so nice in the morning?”

“I had to share a room with my brother,” he said, “So he always woke me up early, and I got used to it.”

“I could never share a room,” Gob said, shuddering at the mere thought of it.

Tony chuckled. “But you hold onto me every night like I’m going to blow away in the wind.”

Gob blushed. Sure, maybe he was a little clingy at night sometimes, but he had never really liked to snuggle in the past, not with girls. The sex would be nice (all 5 seconds of it), but he would want to get the hell out of there after it, usually because he had embarrassed himself somehow. “You’re…you’re warm,” he said, which was true, but more of an excuse than anything. He just liked being held by Tony.

Tony gave him another affectionate peck on the cheek. “You’re cute. Put some toast in the toaster, okay? I’m going to make eggs before we go to the airport.”

Gob figured as exhausted as he was, he could do that. It was quiet, the sound of Tony shuffling through the cabinet and the sizzling of eggs the only sounds that occupied the room. Gob found himself thinking about how used to this he had become; waking up next to Tony, doing things like cooking breakfast together. “Hey, you’re staring off into space,” Tony nudged him. “You need another cup of coffee?”

“I…sorry. Just thinking.”

“Oh, so you get all introspective this early, that makes sense.”

Gob wasn’t really sure what introspective meant, but he nodded. “I was thinking about, y’know, when skating is over, sh-should I…I mean, you might want me to…I guess it depends on whether I win or not but I—”

“Gobie. Hey,” Tony took his hand. “Don’t think about that now. You don’t have to worry about winning just yet, just focus on waking up and eating and getting to Canada. Don’t think so far ahead.”

Gob sighed. Tony’s advice didn’t necessarily apply to what he was worried about (disappointing Tony), but he couldn’t find the words to express his worries. They weighed heavy on his tongue and he felt like Tony would be mad at him for even assuming things. It was one of those things he had so many thoughts about, but he was too scared to bring it up—his romantic feelings for Tony had been the same way. But he couldn’t really solve anything like this with a kiss.

He figured if he just skated well, Tony wouldn’t be disappointed. He would just have to do well and win gold and he wouldn’t have to face that fear. “You’re just tired,” Tony said, handing him a plate. “At the risk of sounding like my mother, you’ll feel better with something in your stomach.”

“Thanks,” Gob said. “Are you sad you’re not going to compete in World’s?”

“Honestly, yeah, a little,” Tony sighed. “I feel like I’m kind of living through you.” That didn’t necessarily help Gob’s worries, and he tensed a little, but he kept his mouth shut. “But—I think you’re gonna do amazing, and whether you medal or not, I think people will be really amazed by what you do. You’re a rising star after all.”

“I stole your limelight,” that, at least, made Gob smirk cockily.

“Suuure,” Tony said. “You can say that when you go to the Olympics, alright? Eat your food.”

Gob ate quickly, trying to push everything else he was worried about away. It wasn’t so easy, but he felt Tony’s hand on his knee and leaned in, feeling a little better. “Putting my slight jealousy aside, it’s gonna be okay,” Tony said.

“You mean you’re gonna stop being jealous?”

He chuckled. “Well…maybe not. But what I mean is, I know you’re gonna do well.”

 _What if I don’t though?_ The question was nearly screaming at Gob in his head. He kept it to himself, because he knew Tony would say the same thing again—that he was gonna be fine. He finished his food and stood up. “We should get going soon.”

“Yeah,” Tony nodded, his forehead creasing. “I still have to get dressed and do my hair. Gimme a few minutes.”

“You take way longer than a few minutes on your hair.”

“Oh, shut up,” Tony replied, but followed it up with a peck on the lips before making his way to the bedroom.

When they arrived at the airport, a few members of Team USA were already there—the ones who trained in California, at least. Sally Sitwell shot Gob a glance, raising an eyebrow when she saw Tony by his side. “What are you doing here?” she asked.

“I’m coming to watch.”

“To watch _Gob_?” Sally pressed, and her suspicion was making Gob a bit worried.

“Well, to watch everyone. What, does a guy have to disappear once he retires? Become a recluse?”

She shrugged. “I guess I just thought you’d rather stay home and watch it on TV or something. You’re not jealous?”

“Well…” Tony hesitated. “Not as much as I thought I’d be, I guess.”

“That’s good, then.” She turned to Gob. “And you? Nervous?”

“I got this,” Gob said, even though he absolutely did not. “What about you?”

Sally seemed to waffle on the question; maybe she was feeling similar to him, nervous but too prideful to say it. Every time he interacted with Sally, she always reminded Gob of his mother. She carried herself nearly the same way, despite being so much younger, and her dry quips always sounded very Lucille Bluth. He had never seen her nervous, not even on the ice. “Yeah, I’ll be fine.” She settled on that.

Gob was pretty sure then that she felt the exact same way as he did—nervous as hell.

“Hey, where’s Aleks?” Tony asked, bringing an end to the awkward interaction.

“He’s flying out of Burbank, I guess,” Gob said. “He hates LAX.”

Sally chuckled. “He’s such an old man.”      

“I don’t blame him. It’s like a fucking zoo in here,” Tony said.

“You’re from New York,” Gob said, an eyebrow raised pointedly.

“Yeah, but it’s just a whole different thing over there. You wouldn’t get it unless you lived there.”

“Pretentious,” Gob said, trying to cover it with a cough, though it wasn’t very convincing. Tony glared at him.

They boarded the plane, and Gob nearly went to curl up at Tony’s side—as much as he could in an airplane seat, anyway—but he pulled away when he realized how it might look to Sally or anyone else on the team. He didn’t know how they would react if they knew him and Tony were together; if they would be mad or confused or grossed out. He had known about pair skaters that were couples, but pair skating was much different than singles in a lot of ways. And even though Tony was retired now, Gob figured people would assume anything—that Tony retired so Gob could win, maybe? It was another thing that he found himself stressed over, and he was so overwhelmed at such a disgustingly early hour of the morning he wanting to bang his head against the wall and cry. This was why he hated planes.

He could feel Tony’s worried eyes on him, but he didn’t return the look; instead, he just stared out the window until they took off.  

* * *

 

“It’s fuckin’ cold,” Gob said through his teeth as they waited for the shuttle to their hotel. “Isn’t it supposed to be spring?”

“It’s Canada, it’s cold for like half the year here,” Sally said.

“Why would anyone wanna live here? I bet it’s warmer in New York than it is here,” he said to Tony.

“Eh, it’s more or less the same. You’re just a California boy.”

“I mean, he has a point,” Sally said. “I don’t know why anyone would stay somewhere so cold. It’s terrible for your skin, anyway.”

“You sound just like Lindsay,” Gob said, which made Sally leer at him—they had been rivals in school after all—but there was a pink to her cheeks that might not have been just from the cold.

They piled into the shuttle when it came, Gob squeezed into a corner with Tony nearly on his lap. Tony chuckled and leaned in to whisper, “You know, if this had happened before we were together, I bet you would’ve been bright red.”

“You—I—I’ve never done that,” he stammered.

“Then how come your cheeks would get all pink every time I touched you? I didn’t notice at first, but…I thought it was cute when I did notice. And I don’t call everything cute.”

Gob looked away. “You’re too much,” he scoffed, becoming aware of Sally’s eyes on them, and brushed Tony away.

When they checked into the hotel, Gob managed to not bring much attention to Tony staying with him, in a room with only one bed. “I hope you don’t think I hate you,” he blurted out as soon as Tony closed the door.

“Huh?”

“I…I don’t like being so secretive, I guess. I wanna tell everyone we’re together. I wanna stand on the podium if— _when_ I win and yell _Tony goddamn Wonder is my boyfriend!!_. But—”

Tony silenced him with a gentle kiss. “It’s okay. I get it. I feel the same, I want to tell everyone but also I don’t want you to become Gob Bluth, Tony Wonder’s boyfriend, and I don’t want people to think I retired because of you.”

Gob flopped down on the bed and sighed. Being so self-aware all day was exhausting. Tony crawled on top of him, straddling his hips and pressing their foreheads together. He smiled, and they kissed slowly for a few moments before Gob began to grasp at Tony’s shirt and pull him closer. “We should break in this bed, huh?” Tony mumbled. “No use getting a room like this otherwise.”

“You’re so fucking smart,” Gob replied, and relaxed underneath him.

* * *

 

March 16, 2001

Gob woke up at 7 the next morning, Tony pressed up against him with his arms around his waist. When he felt Gob shift around, he woke up as well, kissing his shoulder. “Stay, baby,” he said quietly, before even saying good morning. It was so sweet it nearly convinced Gob to stay there all day.

He would’ve, but he sighed and said, “I have practice.”

“Mmm,” Tony hummed disapprovingly.

“You wanna come?” Gob asked. Tony hesitated.

“I…nah. Sorry.”

Gob frowned, but it was early. “Need more sleep?”

“Sort of…also, I feel like it would look weird if I was…just standing there, watching practice y’know,” Tony mumbled, his eyes still closed. “I’d feel jealous. I’d…wanna get on the ice.”

“Ah,” he nodded. “I get it.” It made sense—people came to watch practice all the time, but not highly acclaimed recently, somewhat forcibly retired skaters. “But I kinda wish I could stay here.”

“Me too, believe me,” Tony kissed his neck, his goatee making Gob shiver. “If I didn’t know how important this was, I’d convince you to stay here with me.”

“You wouldn’t have to do much convincing. And really, I’d stay, but Aleks would _kill_ me.”

“Don’t want that. I want you alive so we can have super-hot victory sex after you win this thing.”

It was a nice thought, and something Gob definitely wanted, but it unknowingly added to what felt like an ever-growing stack of pressure that was sitting on his shoulders. Then again, it was also somewhat of a motivator. It was way too early to be thinking of this sort of thing. His brain never worked this hard in the morning. He wriggled out of Tony’s arms and got dressed in his normal practice clothes, grabbing his bag that he had already packed the night before. Tony was already half-asleep. “Have…good practice, babe,” he said through another yawn.

“You’re not really a morning person, are you?” Gob chuckled.

“You know what they say, the night holds the key.”

“…The key to what?”

“I dunno, it’s early. Love you.”

“You, too. Be back soon.”

Gob had a run through of his short program at his practice, and Aleks seemed pleased. “Do you feel confident?” he asked after Gob finished.

“Um…sure,” he replied.

“It is okay to be nervous.”

“Good. Because I’m so, _so_ nervous.”

“You are a little stiff in your performance, I can tell it is because of your nerves. But it is okay. I believe in you.”

Gob smiled, his eyes burning with both the cold air and forming tears. “Thank you. Really.”

“Do you believe you will do well?”

“I don’t know,” he answered, “I don’t really know anything anymore.”

“World’s is a big thing. I understand. But if you believe you will do well, I think you will. I am very impressed with you this season, so is everyone else; judges, Tony, everyone.”

Gob looked down at the mention of Tony. “Yeah.”

“And I know. Your family is never here.”

“I…you don’t know my family,” he stammered, taken aback. He didn’t talk about his family affairs with Aleks, and he figured he didn’t want to hear about them.

Aleks nodded. “I know. But you think I would notice if they came. You would talk to them, give them hugs. But they don’t come. It is sad, but you still do a very good job.”

“I mean,” Gob shrugged. “My family watches it on TV sometimes. But yeah, they don’t come. No one comes. They don’t care enough to come.”

“I care. You do not have to skate for them. You skate for yourself, right?”

It was partly true—Gob skated because he loved it, he _adored_ it. He loved when the audience loved him, when they clapped and cheered and gave him standing ovations. But he sometimes wished his family, his parents especially, were there. He wished they talked about him as highly as they talked about Michael, who didn’t have any medals. “Yeah. I skate for myself.” He said.

But there was Tony. Seeing the look in Tony’s eyes after one of Gob’s good skates, remembering him hugging him and whispering “I’m proud of you”; without things that like that, he didn’t know if he would stay. So he skated for Tony, too. He just hoped that Tony would always be proud of him, as he had been worrying about for what felt like weeks now.

“Keep skating for yourself, then. And you have Tony, a good friend in Tony, yes?”

He had to hold back a laugh in the phrase ‘good friend’ but he nodded. “Then keep your good friend. Now! We still have more time for practice, no more touchy feely. Let’s keep practicing!”

Gob felt a little bit of that weight lift off his shoulders, not all of it, but some. He never expected Aleks to care so much, but he was glad he did.

* * *

 

March 17, 2001

“I’m gonna sit in the spectator’s seats, okay? I don’t want the press to focus on me, just on the skaters actually competing,” Tony said on the bus ride to the stadium.

“I thought you’d like the attention,” Gob said, but regretted it just after. He didn’t want to sound accusatory, but it seemed to come out that way.

“Usually…yeah, maybe. I _guess_. But maybe I’m putting my ego aside for now,” Tony replied sardonically, though not meanly. “This is someone else’s moment, not mine. For once.”

“You’re the worst,” Gob nudged him in response. Were they not on the bus, he would’ve leaned in and kissed him. The other skaters were in the seats surrounding them, though, and he expected a less than positive reaction, so he pursed his lips and clenched his fists.

“Yeah, I do my best. You gonna miss the ‘Somewhere’ program?”

“Maybe. It gave me a lot of problems,” _But it also made me realize how much I liked you,_ he added silently to himself.

“I get it. It was my favorite thing I’ve seen from you, though,” Tony said, his hand squeezing Gob’s quickly before drawing away.

When they arrived at the stadium, Gob and Tony parted, knowing they wouldn’t see each other until the end of the short program. Gob caught up to Sally, who wouldn’t skate until tomorrow, but was there to support the rest of Team USA. “You’re really close to him, huh?” she said, that suspicion creeping into her voice again.

“Yeah, so what?” he replied. “A guy can’t have a friend?”

She laughed. “Don’t get so defensive. I’m not mad, I just…you know you don’t have to hide things around me? I’m not gonna threaten to tell your mom.”

He crossed his arms. “What are you trying to get out of me?”

“Listen, I’m sorry, I guess I should just ask: are you and Tony dating?”

He looked away. “And you want to know because…?”

“I’m curious. But I’m not like—I don’t care if you like guys. Sometimes I wondered, in high school, if you liked guys. You were always bragging all the time about how many chicks you scored and how everyone always wanted you, but I figured if you were _actually_ getting that much, you wouldn’t brag like that.”

Feeling extremely called out, Gob swallowed the lump in his throat. “I mean, I didn’t _know_ back then.”

“Like I said, it’s fine. I mean, I have to admit, sometimes I’ve thought about what it would be like to just grab a girl I’m fighting with and kiss her.”

“Like my sister?” Gob raised an eyebrow.

Sally paled. “I-I well, listen, feelings can be confusing, but—”

He laughed. “I won’t tell, you can sort that out with her.”

“ _Any_ way, I’m glad that you and Tony have something special. You make a cute couple, I guess,” she was reluctant to admit it, as if speaking the praise of anyone else was difficult for her ( _No wonder she likes Lindsay, they’re the same_ , Gob thought). “And I promise I won’t tell anyone. I don’t go around spilling everyone else’s secrets. I’m not like your family.”

He scoffed. “Geez, thanks. You’re a real pal.”

“I try,” she smiled, her blonde hair swishing behind her as she walked away.

Gob felt a little weird, though that wasn’t uncommon after interactions with Sally. Still, like his conversation with Aleks the previous day, it made him feel a little better about everything. In a weird way, they had each other’s backs. He made his way over to where the rest of Team USA was sitting and joined them, realizing he was as ready as he would ever be.

The short programs at World’s took much longer due to their being more groups. At competitions like this, Gob used to count how many skaters were from countries he had never heard of, but he had to stop after he started feeling really dumb for not knowing about a lot of countries. But, really, where _was_ Kazakhstan? He decided to ask Tony later, watching the other skaters intensely and trying really, _really_ hard to ignore everything else. He was in the last group, with the other highly ranked skaters. During the warm up, Aleks pulled him aside, saying, “If you do not win, is not end of the world. If you win, also not end of the world.”

Gob chuckled breathily. “Sure, sure.”

“I am not going to hate you if you lose. You know this, right?”

 _I think I do_ , Gob thought, but said “yes”.

“I just want you to know this. Now, be loose, but not too loose. And remember your footwork and you will be fine.”

Gob went through the rest of the warm up until they were called to leave the ice and waited for his name to be called to go on to skate. The announcer’s voice was more booming and echoing than ever, more than it had been at any other competition. “Ladies and gentlemen, _mesdames et messieurs_ , representing the United States of America, _représentant les Etats-Unis_ , Gawb Bluth!”

So they could speak French in Canada, but they weren’t able to say Gob’s name right. He kept himself from rolling his eyes and instead tried to focus in on the routine. When the music started, he took off and all else was forgotten. The only thing he noticed in the crowd was Tony’s eyes on him—had he ever told Tony what nice eyes he had? They were so blue they were striking, but they were looking at him with a softness. If Tony was nervous at all, he wasn’t showing it outwardly, so Gob tried to emulate that. It was one of the smoothest, if not the smoothest performance of his short he had ever done. As rocky as the start had been for this program, Gob was so glad he could actually do it. At first, he had wanted to prove to the judges that he could do something less theatrical, but in the end he proved to himself that he could be vulnerable on the ice. He figured that was worth something.

When he finished his routine, he smiled at all the USA flags waving for him, but his eyes found Tony’s again and he wished he could just run into his arms. Instead he skated over to Alex, who patted his back encouragingly. “That was beautiful. I’m very happy with it.”

Gob was, too.

* * *

March 22, 2001

Gob didn’t end up winning World’s. Both his programs got very high artistic marks, but skaters from other countries with higher technical scores ended up ahead of him. He ended the competition with a bronze medal, which he was a little upset with at first, but Tony and Aleks both told him how _amazing_ it was to be third best out of 40-some competitors. By the time he got to the medal ceremony and felt it around his neck, he was happy—maybe not as happy as he would be if he won gold. That was the goal for next year, then.

With World’s said and done, Gob and Tony had settled back into their apartment. It was theirs now, even though it started as Tony’s. Gob was waiting for his lease to be up, then he would let someone else rent the apartment. He came to the conclusion that he didn’t really need a backup plan like that anymore.

So far, no one had called to congratulate him for the 3rd place, which wasn’t very surprising. 3rd place was considered losing to his mother. He was a little sad about it, but he felt better when Tony’s mother had called and rambled on about how incredible he was and how he should’ve won over the Russian man. After a few days of being home, Gob’s cellphone rang and he reluctantly picked it up, expecting Lucille. “Hello?”

“Hi!” It was Tracey. A pleasant surprise. “I was wondering if you wanted to come by Michael and I’s place for dinner tonight! We haven’t seen you in a while. I want to hear all about the competition. You did great!”

Gob would feel like a douche if he said no, and maybe Michael was actually happy for him. “Yeah, that sounds cool. Can I bring my—friend? Tony Wonder?” He remembered how much Tracey seemed to like Tony’s skating, and figured they would get along.

“Oh my God! Yes! That would be so cool! He’s not busy?”

Gob laughed. “No, not that I know of.”

“Wow, okay, then yes! Of course! I promise I won’t be too weird about it, like Michael says—you remember I’m not used to seeing _celebrities_ and stuff…”

Gob didn’t know if Tony was a _celebrity_ except to figure skating fans (of which there weren’t that many), but Tracey’s sentiment was sweet. “Okay, I’ll bring him then. What time?”

“5 should work. We’re excited to see you!” She chirped, and they said their goodbyes.

“Who was that?” Tony asked, walking in. “I heard my name. Are you talking about how handsome and cool I am for an interview?”

Gob scoffed. “You’re so full of yourself. That was my sister-in-law Tracey.”

“Oh, Michael’s wife?”

“Yeah. She invited me over for dinner tonight and I asked if you could come. She thinks you’re very handsome and cool, actually.”

“ _Someone_ sees it,” Tony replied, “Sure, I’ll come. It seems like I should meet your family at this point, anyway. You didn’t tell them I was your boyfriend, did you?”

“No, I…I didn’t. Sorry.”

“Hey,” Tony wrapped his arms around Gob’s waist from behind. “It’s okay. I get it,” he kissed Gob’s neck, “It doesn’t have to be now, or later, or ever, really. It doesn’t bother me.”

“Thanks,” Gob sighed, “You’re nice.”

“I try,” he gave him another kiss. “I guess we should get ready to go pretty soon then. It’ll be fine.”

“Yeah. I mean, it can’t be that bad. It’s just a family dinner.”

* * *

 

When Gob and Tony opened the door to Michael and Tracey’s home, it was filled with all the Bluths—Lindsay, back from Boston, Lucille, George Sr, Buster, and of course Michael. “Oh my God,” Gob said.

“Hi!” Tracey quickly made her way over to hug him. “We thought we’d all get together to surprise you, and to congratulate you on winning!”

“He got 3rd, he didn’t win,” Lucille chimed in. Clearly, she had to be talked in to coming here. Gob was surprised she even showed up.

“That’s still pretty good,” Tracey replied. She still wasn’t used to Lucille’s rudeness; maybe because she was one of the only people that Lucille actually liked. “And, oh my God, is this Tony?”

“Yes,” Tony smiled and shook her hand. “Nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too,” she said, evidently trying very hard to seem calm and composed even though Tony was a ‘ _celebrity_ ’. “You’re a great skater.”

“Thank you. So is Gob, though,” Tony looked over to his boyfriend and smiled. Gob was pretty sure he heard Lucille murmur something about someone being a kiss-ass.

“Come, sit down, do you want some red wine?” Tracey ushered them into the kitchen.

“I love red wine!” Tony said, and Gob was sure they would get along perfectly. He walked over to Lindsay, who gave him a hug.

“It’s been awhile, right?” she smiled. “Last time we saw each other was…”

“Your wedding, and then you hauled ass to Boston.”

Lindsay shrugged nonchalantly and took a sip of wine. “I had to get out of here sometime.” Gob couldn’t blame her; maybe when he retired from figure skating him and Tony would take off to New York.

“Where’s your husband? Um…fuck, what’s his name.”

“Wow, you really can’t remember my husband’s name?”

“Oh, c’mon, if I was married you wouldn’t remember either.”

“Maybe so,” she replied. It was the most Lindsay-like way to accept a fault. “Anyway, Tobias is back in Boston for a work thing. Who’s your friend, another skater? He’s cute, for a short guy.”

Gob shot a glance at Tony, who was still chatting with Tracey. “That’s Tony Wonder. He’s a skater, too. And off the market. And so are you.”

“He should’ve brought his girlfriend then. Have you met her?”

 _I am her_ , he thought. _Wait, I’m not her. I’m he. I’m—this is confusing._ “Yeah, I have. Did you watch skating at all this season? Sally did good.”

“I watched you…sometimes. I don’t really watch the girls skate.”

Gob couldn’t help but smirk thinking about what Sally had said about her during their talk at World’s. “What, you get jealous?”

She rolled her eyes. “No, I don’t even skate. I just don’t have the time to watch TV.” He didn’t know what she was doing with all her time; she didn’t have a job. But the Bluths were masters at excuses if nothing else.

Buster was the next to congratulate him, gripping his shoulders and hugging him so tight he almost lost his breath. “Brother!! You won!”

Gob choked/laughed. “Well, 3rd place.”

“You got a medal though! Can I see it sometime?”

“Sure, I’ll bring it over. It’s pretty heavy.”

Buster was glowing. It was nice to have one person in his family whose pride was genuine.

Eventually, they all sat down at the table for dinner. “Your brother’s wife is _super_ nice,” Tony whispered in Gob’s ear.

“That’s because she hasn’t been ruined by our family just yet,” he replied. “But yeah, I like her.”

Tony chuckled. “Even if things were horrible, the wine is good enough for me not to care.”

“God, I wish I liked wine like you do.”

“Don’t worry, it doesn’t make me like you any less.”

After a few moments of small talk between the family, Lucille gave Gob a pointed glance. “So, 3rd place? 1st was just too difficult, I imagine?”

Gob sighed. “My technical marks weren’t as high as the 1st and 2nd place, but my artistic marks—”

“So you can’t land a jump as good as Russia, then?” George Sr asked. “How hard is it to beat some communists?”

“They had insane combinations, like triple-triple-triples, and…” Gob stopped himself when Tony placed a hand on his knee under the table. He wasn’t sure why he was trying to explain myself to his parents. “I’m gonna aim for 1st next year.”

“Fat chance. You know they’re only going to get better,” Lucille swirled her martini in her glass. “You only got lucky this year because your friend had to retire.”

“The season just ended. Can’t you give him a break?” Tony said, seemingly out of nowhere. Gob turned to him, eyebrows raised. He had been sitting quietly and drinking his wine until this moment. He appreciated Tony’s piping up, though. He didn’t expect that kind of confidence. The Bluths were an intimidating bunch, but he knew by now Tony’s confidence in skating carried over to everything else in his life.

Lucille looked less angry and more impressed. Anyone who could respond to Lucille’s barbs so sharply and challengingly was something she wasn’t used to. “The short ones usually are feisty, aren’t they,” she commented, looking at her nails.

“I’m just saying, we’ve been home for like 5 days. And you never come watch any of the events anyway, so I don’t see why you care.”

She let out a shocked little laugh. “You’re opinionated. We’ll just have to see how next season goes, won’t we? You won’t be there, you’re not jealous someone has taken your place?”

“Not…not really,” he replied, “I like Gob. If it were anyone else, maybe I’d be jealous.”

“You’ve certainly put up with him longer than anyone else has,” Michael chimed in, receiving a reprimanding nudge from Tracey. “I mean—good for you two, I’m glad you’re friends.”

Gob, in a random spur of confidence mixed with spontaneity and a little bit of fear, said, “He’s—we’re—boyfriends, actually.” Tony looked at him in pure shock, and he was worried that he had completely fucked up and Tony would go storming out of the house at any second.

“I _told_ you this would happen,” George Sr turned to his wife, “You sign him up for a sport full of gay men…”

“Oh, please,” she rolled her eyes, “You think I didn’t suspect it ages ago? I don’t _care_. At least his boyfriend has some balls and drinks good wine.”

“Someone thinks his best friend is his mother,” Buster sing-songed, ignoring all the weird looks that came his way. Everyone decided to ignore it.

Thinking back on what his mother said, Gob supposed that was as close as Lucille could get to a compliment, and he was pleasantly surprised by it. Tony, too, smiled. “Thank you, Lucille,” he said, “I guess that makes up for me not liking vodka so much?”

“You’re just not drinking the right brands. Don’t worry, I’ll show you.”

As the dinner progressed, Tracey and Lindsay got caught up in conversation, Lucille (with Buster clinging to her side) and Tony were discussing their experiences playing bridge, and George Sr had camped out in the living room reading the newspaper. Gob went to the kitchen to fix himself something stronger to drink, and when he turned around, he realized his younger brother had been at his heels the whole time. “What’s up, Mikey?”

“I just wanted to say, uh,” he began carefully, “I’m totally cool with you and Tony being—together. He seems like a nice guy. I mean, Tracey likes him, so…”

Gob poured some whiskey in a glass. “Thanks for not being too weird about it. He’ll probably stick around for a while.”

“More than a while,” Michael replied, “He seems to be really into you. Kind of reminds me of Tracey and I. I mean…it’s different, but…” he was trying really, really hard to be supportive. Gob had to laugh and push him a little.

“Hey, guy, it’s fine. Thanks. Maybe one day you’ll be my best man at the wedding?”

Michael smiled. “Who else would it be?”

When Gob walked out, a glass of whiskey in hand, Tony was sitting on the couch, everyone intently listening to what he had to say. He evidently had impressed all the Bluths (George Sr excluded, but nothing impressed him, so who cares?). Gob observed it for a moment. He was telling some story about something crazy that happened in New York, even managing to make Lucille laugh. Buster just looked scared, but that was typical. When his story was over, Gob walked over and sat on the arm of the couch. “Hey,” Tony said softly, looking up at him with a smile.

“Hi. Having fun?”

“Yeah. What about you, you okay?”

“Oh, of course, I just needed a drink. Sorry for, um, saying that we’re together in front of my family, I really wasn’t expecting to say it, but…it just came out.”

“It’s fine,” Tony said sincerely, “They were actually…not terrible about it.”

“I know, right? Not what I expected. But my mom likes you, so you’ve basically won here.”

“Hell yeah,” he grinned, “We’re going to play bridge next week, actually.”

Gob was the one to shake his head at Tony now, “I don’t know how you do that. Anyway, do you wanna get going soon? I had fun, but…”

“Your family is kind of exhausting, I get it,” Tony lowered his voice to a whisper. “I’m driving, though. I only had one glass of wine, and you had…I don’t know how many.”

“I mean, fine, but I’m not drunk at all. I just want to go home and be with you.”

“I’d like that, too,” Tony said, leaning foreword and giving Gob an inconspicuous kiss on the cheek. They said their goodbyes to the family, Tony confirmed his bridge time with Lucille, and Buster hugged Gob and made him promise to show him the medal again. They got in the car, closing the space between them and kissing for a few long moments. “You know I love you, right?” Tony asked.

“I do,” Gob replied, and he did know. That was the thing he was most sure of in his life—that he loved Tony Wonder, and Tony loved him too, as crazy as that was. He didn’t care about a 3rd place medal at World’s. He wouldn’t have cared if Gob came in dead last, and Gob saw that now. It was the most genuine relationship either of them had ever had, and it was scary and new, but mostly beautiful. It was sickeningly cliché, but he didn’t want to change a thing.

“Love you too.” They shared another kiss, then Tony started the car up and made his way to their home. He even let Gob play Queen on the way back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> again, thanks SO much for all the support, comments, and kudos. thank you to my #gurlgroup4evah, i literally do not know where i would be without y'all. i hope to write more AD fic in the future, if you all want to see more from me. all the thanks. xoxoxox

**Author's Note:**

> i will update as often as i can. comments are greatly appreciated and thank you for reading xoxoxox


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